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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

When you have bad handwriting, notes to yourself are just fun little riddles you get to solve later.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

I get unreasonably happy when a YouTube video has subtitles that aren’t auto-generated.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Is there a rehab for introverts who try to extrovert? Asking for a friend.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Quitting my job to pursue my true passion: not having a job.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

I like it when it’s raining, because I can hold my umbrella really low and it makes everyone headless.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Ramen is just anime spaghetti.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Jeez. It’s like the people in this nursing home have never heard techno before.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Always be kind. You never know who has subscriptions to your favorite streaming apps.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

The masculine urge to hitch your pants up after making a minor decision.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

Can someone please fix the algorithm of my life?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

629 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,222

Funny Quotes Topics

17,352

Funny Quotes Images

15,222

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,844

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Telegram:

Everyone gives pleasure in some way, one when they enter a room, the other when they leave it.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Paid my rent and slept in every room of my house this week, kitchen and laundry room next.

Just shared via Slack:

Gonna close my bank account and keep all my money on me, like Sonic the Hedgehog.

Shared recently on Reddit:

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

Freshly posted on Slack:

This morning, like every morning, he practiced his quick draw of his finger guns in the bathroom mirror, because you just never know.

Spotted on X:

I miss my Dad opening the windows and talking about cross-ventilation.

Trending via Instagram:

Some days you feel like you’re surrounded by idiots, other days you realize it’s not just some days.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Sorry, I don’t think I can hang out this weekend, my 4-year-old is still telling a joke.

Trending via Reddit:

There are approximately 1,010,300 words in the English language, but I could never string enough words together to properly express how much I want to hit you with a chair.

Spotted on X:

Girls take a picture of their legs in a bubble bath and say “guess where I am”. The library?

One of my biggest faults is that when I ask someone their name, I forget to listen to what their name is.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sounds like you're playing "Guess Who?" in real life! 🤔🙉💭

ask, conversation, fault, faults, forget, forgetfulness, humor, i, interaction, listen, memory, name, social, social interaction, someone

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I bet being full feels so good for the moon.

0

2 months ago

being, bet, feels, full, good, i, moon
The closer you are to nature, the further you are from idiots.

0

2 months ago

closer, environment, humor, idiots, nature, outdoors, sarcasm, wilderness
What if all the ancient Greek sculptures are actually victims of Medusa?

0

2 months ago

actually, ancient, ancient art, ancient Greece, art, greece, greek, Greek sculpture, humor, Medusa, myth, mythology, sculpture
Why is experimental noise music always scary metallic noises and never fun sounds like people clapping and laughing and like bubbles and stuff?

0

4 months ago

always, bubble, clapping, experimental, experimental music, fun, fun sound, laughing, metallic, metallic noise, music, never, noise, noise music, noises, people, scary, scary sound, sound, sounds, stuff, why
Forced to say “it’s okay” instead of throwing a chair at them.

0

2 months ago

anger, chair, comedy, coping, coping mechanism, emotional, emotional regulation, forced, frustration, humor, mechanism, okay, patience, regulation, relief, say, self-control, stress, stress relief, throwing
This too shall pass, but what the hell?

0

2 months ago

hell, humor, irony, life, pass, perspective, struggle, this too shall pass, too

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

33 shares on Twitch this month:

‘I love reading!’ says the woman who loves owning books.

93 shares on Telegram this month:

Life so stupid, I just want a burger and to be held.

28 shares on Slack this month:

When I was young I fixed my parents’ computer and now that I’m older I fix computers for my kids. Are we the only generation that knows how computers work?

11 shares on Snapchat this month:

I was so excited thinking tomorrow was Friday only to find out it is definitely not Friday.

34 shares on Telegram this month:

Every Jurassic Park movie should end with an insurance adjuster getting a phone call and immediately throwing up.

62 shares on Threads this month:

I thought I had more straws. Sorry, turns out that was the last one.

96 shares on Snapchat this month:

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

67 shares on Snapchat this month:

…and so ends another week of me not becoming unexpectedly rich.

52 shares on Reddit this month:

It’s important to fuel your body with essential nutrients, which can be found in cookies, chips, and candy.

83 shares on Slack this month:

Once your parents move from “What time are you coming back” to “Are you coming back today,” you have won the war.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

You can add tears while cooking if you don’t have salt.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

Is everyone enjoying their entire month of August off work with full pay? Oh yeah, I forgot, only Congress gets to do that.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Gonna vibe recklessly and call it “character development”

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

Normalize ending a hang-out abruptly by saying ‘I wanna go home now’ and then going home.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

Don’t tell me what to do unless you are naked.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

Bought an eggplant, imma grow my own eggs.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

Sex is like tacos. I wish I were having some now.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Tuesday is just Monday wearing a fake mustache.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

I’m instantly 70% nicer after 3 p.m. on Fridays.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

Have you ever wanted to grab somebody by the shoulders, give them a good shake and whisper “Nobody cares!”

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

Getting an extra 20 minutes in the day when someone cancels a meeting is like finding a penny on the ground. Not gonna use it for anything, but wow, am I excited.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Slipping into something a little more comfortable (psychosis).

Seen just now on Instagram:

Weirdos gonna weird.

Going viral on Telegram:

A guy waited exactly 3 days to text me. Someone’s been studying the ancient scrolls of 1980s dating advice.

Shared recently on YouTube:

“Dress for the job you want, not for the job you have” is all well and good until you’re rocking a tutu.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I composed this post in a way that only the sexy can read it, so congratulations.

Just landed via X:

I used to be cool and now I say things like “It’s so loud in here, I can’t hear myself think”.

Making waves on Discord:

Twitter hits different, cause it’s like the only social media app you can use effectively while playing music.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Superwoman: Single. Batman: Single. Wonder Woman: Single. I get it now, I’m single because I’m a superhero.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Let’s play a game called you bring me food and I eat it.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

One of my biggest faults is that when I ask someone their name, I forget to listen to what their name is.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I bet being full feels so good for the moon.

The closer you are to nature, the further you are from idiots.

What if all the ancient Greek sculptures are actually victims of Medusa?

Why is experimental noise music always scary metallic noises and never fun sounds like people clapping and laughing and like bubbles and stuff?

Forced to say “it’s okay” instead of throwing a chair at them.

This too shall pass, but what the hell?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨