Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

A 20% discount sounds great until you realize you can’t afford the other 80%

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

The food hits different when it ain’t yours.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

When I become president, any public holiday that falls on a Thursday automatically extends to Friday.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

I spend all day on Facebook so that Mark Zuckerberg can eat.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

The dude who invented the autocorrect has died. Restaurant in piece.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

I can’t stand people who require so much validation. Please like and share this if you agree.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

I wish I was as tired in bed at night as I am after lunch at work.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

I’m awake and working. Please respect my privacy during these trying and emotional times.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Twitter is basically like a mental institution where everyone thinks they’re the sane one, and everybody else is crazy.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

King Kong should’ve been able to find a better place to hide than the top of the tallest building in the middle of New York City.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

296 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,565

Funny Quotes Topics

17,623

Funny Quotes Images

15,565

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,469

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

I don’t know how to knit, so I made you a tinfoil hat.

Spotted on Instagram:

“There are lots of benefits to working here. We have fun social events and activities after work!” And what are the benefits?

Going viral on Twitch:

Tried online dating, and it turns out my soulmate is a Nigerian prince who needs my bank details to escape his kingdom.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Middle-aged math is going out drinking and feeling half your age then waking up the next morning feeling twice your age.

Going bananas on Messenger:

I tried selling my soul to the devil, and he said no.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

All dogs are therapy dogs. The majority are just freelancing.

Seen just now on Threads:

Used shampoo containing caffeine. My hair is already on its way to work.

Going viral on Instagram:

Going through life with a signature I invented as a teenager.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Don’t interrupt me while I’m embarrassing myself.

Just landed via Telegram:

“Stand up for yourself!” Girl, I have low iron.

Sometimes, when you go with the flow you end up drowning with everyone else.

3 days ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Going with the flow seemed so chill until I realized I forgot my floaties! 🌊😂🛟

advice, crowd, drowning, else, end, everyone, flow, humor, irony, metaphor, sometimes

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

You don’t scare me. You’re not the evil eye I get from my dog when I make him get up from the couch so I can lay down.

3 months ago

behavior, couch, dog, evil, evil eye, eye, humor, i, lay, lay down, me, pet, pet behavior, relatable, sarcasm, scare
Someone told me I wasn’t thinking clearly, as if that’s even an option.

2 months ago

attitude, even, humor, humor quote, i, me, option, perspective, sarcasm, someone, thinking, told, wit
Shout out to people jogging in this heat, no, seriously, shout out to make sure they’re okay.

2 months ago

concern, exercise, heat, humor, jogging, okay, people, seriously, shout, shout out, sure
Please be nice to me. I’m in my twenties. Do you know what that does to a person?

5 months ago

adulthood, age, humor, know, life, life phase, me, nice, person, personality, phase, plea, please, twenty
Monday is already sending me threatening glances from across the room.

3 months ago

across, glance, humor, me, Monday, motivation, personification, procrastination, room, threat, threatening, workweek
Are you stupid, sand? You could just lay here forever on this beautiful beach, but no, you have to try with all you’ve got, to get into my shoes.

2 months ago

beach, beautiful, forever, frustration, here, humor, just, lay, nature, sand, sh, stupid, try

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

56 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m always best at the things I shouldn’t do.

47 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Peeling a sweaty sports bra off counts as aerobic exercise, right?

40 shares on Discord this month:

That’s me in the corner, that’s me in the spotlight, spreading goat cheese on a bagel.

63 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you ever feel like a failure, just remember, Domino’s tried to open pizza chains in Italy.

77 shares on WeChat this month:

Adulthood means trying to convince yourself that the font is just too small and that it isn’t your eyesight going bad.

69 shares on YouTube this month:

You’re the ‘S’ to my ‘HTTP’; without you, I’m just a bad connection!

60 shares on YouTube this month:

Girl, if the moon can block the sun, then you can definitely block your ex.

13 shares on Messenger this month:

Don’t mispronounce anything next to me and think I didn’t hear it.

87 shares on Reddit this month:

Very disappointed to find out that the universal remote control I bought does not control the universe.

13 shares on Facebook this month:

Any room can be a bathroom if you hate the person who’s house you’re in.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

If I was a priest, I’d make my side of the confession booth really big so I could run around.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

I want a small, tasteful wedding. No family. No friends. No groom. Just me eating a big cake.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

We should be able to take our arms off when we go to sleep, we have the technology.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

If you step on the back of my shoe and it comes off, I will do the same thing to your head.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

How great is it to do absolutely nothing and follow it up by taking a rest.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Hobbies include fake smiling while waiting for people to stop talking.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

After much deliberation, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m an overthinker.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

Nothing more dangerous than an ignorant man who thinks he is a genius.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

You have been a very bad boy. Now go to my room!

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

Out of Office: I am on vacation. Your emails will be forwarded nowhere to be read by no one. Good day.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Slack:

Pretty sure the inventor of noise-canceling headphones had a young kid trying to learn an instrument.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

My life is constantly oscillating between “must save money” and “you only live once”.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Actors in black and white movies were often putting their lives in danger during driving scenes, as they weren’t able to tell if the traffic light was red or green.

Breaking via Facebook:

I’m the product of too much television and zero supervision.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I will never give another woman my heart until I see how she acts when a bee flies at her.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Some people come into your life to remind you why you don’t wanna let anyone into your life.

Trending via Messenger:

One night stands just make more sense for single people. Why would you need a night stand on both sides of the bed?

Trending via Facebook:

I love my bed so much, what a place.

Trending via Telegram:

Runners who smoke need to pick a side.

Making waves on Telegram:

Nothing prepared me for the part of adulthood where you look like a baby deer learning to walk every time you get out of bed in the morning.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Sometimes, when you go with the flow you end up drowning with everyone else.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

You don’t scare me. You’re not the evil eye I get from my dog when I make him get up from the couch so I can lay down.

Someone told me I wasn’t thinking clearly, as if that’s even an option.

Shout out to people jogging in this heat, no, seriously, shout out to make sure they’re okay.

Please be nice to me. I’m in my twenties. Do you know what that does to a person?

Monday is already sending me threatening glances from across the room.

Are you stupid, sand? You could just lay here forever on this beautiful beach, but no, you have to try with all you’ve got, to get into my shoes.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨