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Commentary:
🤣📺 When your husband's love for sports gets a little too aggressive, just whip out those tariff threats! Who knew trade negotiations could also be part of marital bliss? 💼🏈 #TradeWarsAtHome #SportsVsTariffs

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My parents told me I could be anything I wanted so I became unacceptable.

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2 months ago

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Three serious exes is the right amount before you meet your spouse. You need one truly evil one, one normal one, and one situationship, and then you’ve basically experienced all dating has to offer.

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2 months ago

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I used to have this mental illness, where I thought logical arguments would change someone’s mind.

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2 months ago

argument, arguments, change, changing, changing mind, humor, i, illness, logical, logical argument, mental, mental illness, mind, sarcasm, thought, used, where
Australia is like someone’s still playing Jumanji.

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2 months ago

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Happiness is having a large, caring, close-knit family in another city.

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2 months ago

caring, city, close-knit, distance, family, happiness, humor, irony, relationships
It’s cool that women want me, but it makes me sad that fish fear me.

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2 months ago

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New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on YouTube this month:

My kid tells me his toothpaste is “too spicy” but he doesn’t seem to be having any trouble with Flamin’ Hot Cheetos.

39 shares on Telegram this month:

Careful, “friend”. One more word about Shakira and you might find out just how fast I can draw this blade.

53 shares on Reddit this month:

“Fox Mulder” is an aggressively sexy name.

44 shares on Threads this month:

Unemployed folks always have esoteric knowledge, for some reason.

47 shares on X this month:

That moment when a zombie out for brains walks past you.

40 shares on Discord this month:

When I die, throw me on Mount Everest so it looks like I was trying to do something.

80 shares on YouTube this month:

Live, laugh, lie to the doctor about how many drinks you have per week.

86 shares on Discord this month:

Frankly, I have too many situations and not enough monitors.

100 shares on Reddit this month:

I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

64 shares on Instagram this month:

I’ll be home for Christmas, because that’s where I live.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Life is weird and then you die.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

First date idea: we walk around a graveyard and guess how people died.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Money is always a motive for murder. Stay broke.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

People are always saying “not today, Satan” but what if we just hear him out.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

What do you mean I never reach out? I literally thought about you.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

My favorite dinner is the one made by someone else.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Sorry, I booped your nose, but I was really hoping it was a mute button.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

My favorite thing to do on the weekend is not leave my house.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

Pouring rain, football on TV, empty house; the stuff dreams are made of.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

An Amish party in the desert called churning man.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Facebook:

That uncle who kept his distance from the rest of the family will start making more sense to you as you get older.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

That little stroll to the coffee maker makes me happy every morning.

Shared recently on Discord:

Men invented pool tables so they could watch each other bend over.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

I like to minimize the disappointment by being myself right from the start.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

When the Beatles say, “Come together, right now, over me,” what was that about? Why did they say that?

Making waves on WeChat:

The shower is the only one who gets turned on when I’m naked.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

In English we say: “You changed.” But in poetry we say: “You became a stranger wearing the face I used to love, and I am haunted by the ghost of who you were.”

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Roses are red. Bumble bees buzz. This rhyme doesn’t rhyme. No, wait, yes it does.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Giving all the dogs in my neighborhood matching sweaters for Christmas so they can be in a gang.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Threatening my husband with tariffs every time he tries to make me watch sports on TV.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

My parents told me I could be anything I wanted so I became unacceptable.

Three serious exes is the right amount before you meet your spouse. You need one truly evil one, one normal one, and one situationship, and then you’ve basically experienced all dating has to offer.

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought logical arguments would change someone’s mind.

Australia is like someone’s still playing Jumanji.

Happiness is having a large, caring, close-knit family in another city.

It’s cool that women want me, but it makes me sad that fish fear me.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨