When I gain weight, I should get to designate where on my body it goes. Posted onFeb 2, 2026 by slickboy in Funny Quotes 💾 Save Image Commentary:Sounds like a solid negotiation tactic with the metabolism gods! ππ€π Related funny posts π Sometimes my toddler throws stuff on the floor and then shouts βOH NOβ and thatβs kind of like what politicians do. I used to be able to eat whatever I wanted without gaining weight. Now I pick up a fork and gain seven pounds. Never trust someone who can eat 24/7 but is still skinny. Some people can eat anything they want and stay slim. I put on weight just by reading the recipe. My body is a machine that turns pizza into diarrhea.