You don’t scare me, I was married once. Posted on7 days ago7 days ago by slickboy in Funny Quotes 💾 Save Image FacebookXPinterestRedditLinkedInEmailWhatsAppCommentary:"Ah, the battle-tested warrior of relationships! 💪🏼💍 Who needs fear when you've survived the ultimate challenge? Take that, unknown adversaries! 😂 #MarriageWarrior" Related Funny Quotes 🤝 When a man gets married he has a moral obligation to scare his wife when he sneezes. Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck got engaged, broke up, married other people, had children, reunited, got married, broke up again, and I’ve been single that whole time. Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket. I hope we’re good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people. You don’t scare me, you’re not my kid noticing her sibling got a bigger slice of cake.