Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

“Normalize this, normalize that.” How about y’all feel shame for once?

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

You’re not lazy, you’re just buffering in HD.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

The older I get, the more I hate making extra stops after work. I drive home like I’m late for the house.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

I’m not an alcoholic, I only drink twice a year. When it’s sunny, and when it isn’t.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Everyone thinks they won’t be that couple that goes from ‘everything you do is a turn-on’ to ‘you’re breathing too loud,’ but they will be, oh, they will be.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

Has anyone noticed what it’s beginning to look a lot like?

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

I like to notice patterns and do nothing about it.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

Some people don’t have a permanent handwriting. It depends on their mood and the pen they use.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

All our dogs think we quit our jobs to spend more time with them. All our cats think we got fired for being lazy.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Being single past 30 is like playing hide and seek, except no one is looking for you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,594

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

In my 20’s: why is eating healthy such a big deal anyways. In my 40’s: oh.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Establish dominance over your children by whining louder.

Making waves on TikTok:

Can I come over and circle you like a vulture?

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Crazy to think the average Zoomer male just works, watches porn, and plays video games. That’s it. That’s their whole life.

Shared recently on TikTok:

How can I be expected to get out of bed when I don’t want to?

Spotted on Twitch:

The Jaws theme stays on during sex.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

They expect me to work at work.

Just shared via Instagram:

I need to go to jail for a while to catch up on all my reading.

Making waves on Slack:

I’m not crazy, I’m just mentally spicy.

Live now on Reddit:

If sex was real, I think I would’ve had it by now.

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

4 weeks ago

Witty and humorous quote about humility and learning from the best.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Want to master humility? Just follow my lead—I'm the best at being humble! 😎🙌 #HumbleBrag"

anyone, arrogance, best, comedy, confidence, feel, free, humble, humility, humor, joke, learn, learning, me, nothing, sarcasm, satire, self-deprecating, talk, wants, witty

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Social Media Stars ⭐

74 shares on WeChat this month:

I wanted to wear some hot lingerie, but didn’t have any, so I put on this red dental floss.

71 shares on X this month:

Every day, I go to work and draw a little tick on everyone who didn’t say goodbye to me the day before.

37 shares on Twitch this month:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to flirt today.

48 shares on X this month:

It sucks that brainwashing is a bad thing, because generally speaking the idea of washing my brain sounds so nice.

24 shares on YouTube this month:

I get unreasonably happy when a YouTube video has subtitles that aren’t auto-generated.

46 shares on Facebook this month:

Apple juice tastes like it wants to be alcohol, but it’s too shy.

67 shares on WeChat this month:

I think everyone should get $500 deposited into their accounts every day, just for waking up.

66 shares on WeChat this month:

I highly recommend having hobbies. It distracts you from things like falling in love.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

Buying new glasses this week, so a whole bunch of you are about to get a whole lot uglier.

83 shares on Slack this month:

Friends with benefits but the benefits are you getting me an internship with your father’s network.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

I really don’t care what happens to me romantically anymore.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

A woman’s way of flirting is thinking about you until you get the urge to reach out to her.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

Wearing a condom while she’s on birth control is called two-factor authentication.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

If they can bring back the dire wolf, they can bring back Norm Macdonald.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

One of the most amazing things in nature is that the basketball hoop is the perfect size to fit a basketball through.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

I hate small cars that disguise themselves as free parking spaces and drop their masks as soon as you pull up in front of them.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

What did people do before eyeglasses, like half the world just walked around not being able to see?

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

My neighbors were up shouting all night. I could barely hear my bagpipes.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Hot girl in her 20s: It’s so weird, but I keep getting lucky, and everything works out in my favor.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

I’ll be home for Christmas, because that’s where I live.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Don’t listen to them, little password. You are strong.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Plot twist: the universe is waiting for you to give it a sign.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I think my dad just eradicated a small village with his sneeze.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Tonight I wanted to stop drinking but then I remembered the owner of the pub has a family to feed.

Going viral on Discord:

Musk goes “exactly,” and it’s the stupidest tweet you’ve ever read in your entire life.

Live now on Reddit:

For whom the Fetty Waps.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Eating rice with my hands, but not in a political way. In a lazy, fat guy way.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

At the Pride and Prejudice showing booing whenever Prejudice comes on screen.

Seen just now on Instagram:

At this point, the only thing that can heal me is memory loss.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Let’s lay on the couch together, play on our phones, and ignore each other, babe.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

Everyone tells me “take care”, but no one tells me why.

You’re never too old or too stupid to become older and stupider.

I’m glad the makers removed all the unnecessary sex scenes from my life, so I can focus on character development.

Remember: The first step to recovery is addiction.

Do goalies ever get lonely during a game?

The October urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a horrifying backstory.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Everyone tells me “take care”, but no one tells me why.

You’re never too old or too stupid to become older and stupider.

I’m glad the makers removed all the unnecessary sex scenes from my life, so I can focus on character development.

Remember: The first step to recovery is addiction.

Do goalies ever get lonely during a game?

The October urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a horrifying backstory.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨