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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

You’re like if “nope” was a person.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

I don’t need a New Year’s resolution, it’s the year’s turn to be better.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

Taking a dog named shark to the beach is a bad idea.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

It’s crazy I need a certificate to prove I was born when you can literally just look at me.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

Just stay single, y’all… I’m here apologizing for taking a nap.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

Me and my boys are broke, so we take turns taking pictures of one iced matcha.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

A foghorn but for people who can’t see through their own bullshit.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

You can’t fix stupid, but you can watch it in action on social media every day.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

They should invent a way to delete other people’s posts.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

Eating the rest of the donuts will keep me from eating donuts tomorrow. My logic is flawless.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

218 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,487

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,487

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,399

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Slack:

Yesterday my husband thought he saw a cockroach in the kitchen. He sprayed and cleaned everything thoroughly. Today I’m putting the cockroach in the bathroom.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

“Santa isn’t real!” Okay, I literally just saw him at the mall.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I’m not your dream woman. I am the sudden shouting of ravens that you hear when you enter a part of the forest you shouldn’t have.

Being an adult feels like, “If I can just get through this week, I’ll be okay,” but it’s every damn week.

4 months ago

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Commentary:
Adulting is like being stuck in a perpetual Monday—can't wait for this "week" to end! 🗓️😅🚀

adult, adulting, being, every, exhaustion, feels, humor, i, just, life, okay, perseverance, stress, struggle, through, week

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The real flex is how many wounds you can turn into wisdom.

0

2 months ago

flex, growth, humor, real, resilience, turn, wisdom, wounds
Lego better be trying to cure child cancer with how much their shit cost.

0

2 months ago

better, cancer, child, child cancer, cost, humor, Lego, pricing, sarcasm, shit, toys, trying
A storm knows it’s laced with destruction, and yet it rages on.

0

6 months ago

destruction, knows, metaphor, nature, rage, storm
That sound when you close the cupboard and hear something fall inside, that’s the sound of somebody else’s problem.

0

2 months ago

close, cupboard, fall, hear, humor, inside, problem, relatable, somebody, something, sound
“God has a plan for you!” Okay, well, I have some notes for him.

0

2 months ago

advice, criticism, God, humor, i, life, life advice, notes, okay, plan, sarcasm, well
“What’s something you’d tell your younger self?” You can have ice cream for dinner, nobody will stop you.

0

2 months ago

advice, cream, dinner, freedom, fun, ice, ice cream, indulgence, nobody, self, stop, tell, younger, younger self

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on Slack this month:

I wish that reading books in the park were my job, and I got paid six figures for it.

21 shares on TikTok this month:

A fun thing to do at work is call in sick and stay home.

15 shares on Facebook this month:

I’ve decided that my 20s are actually from 25 – 35.

18 shares on Snapchat this month:

Stop telling people to grow up. Have you seen adults?

97 shares on WeChat this month:

Very disappointed by the symbolism of last night’s dream. Just really obvious, derivative stuff.

19 shares on WeChat this month:

Thanksgiving is just me trying to look cute while holding a fork like a medieval warrior.

24 shares on Pinterest this month:

Why learn new slang? Stay bogus.

78 shares on Pinterest this month:

Due to rising prices, Dollar Tree is changing their name to ‘Tree Fiddy’.

48 shares on WhatsApp this month:

When you’re sad, find two equally sad friends and form a cryangle.

29 shares on Messenger this month:

There are two quantities of popcorn: not enough and what have I done

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Spotify wrapped is like my annual mental health report and it’s getting worse by each passing year.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

A more accurate description would be ‘The Darker Web’.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

Imagine being in the Trojan horse with the lads, pure darkness and giggling like hehehe

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Is ‘ugh’ an emotion? Because I fell it all the time.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

It’s strange that watching paint dry is considered boring but going to an art gallery is considered interesting. That’s just watching paint that’s already dry.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I’d just laugh and search with them.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

This entire year I was method acting. None of it was real. I was working on a bit.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Adulting: unlocking life’s mysteries, one therapy session at a time.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

Just seen the cost of funerals and no wonder people are living longer.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

The female ability to be able to guess exactly which girl it is out of his 740 following.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

If biscuits were slimming and contained every nutrient the human body needs, I’d be in terrific shape.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

You can’t tell me there’s anything better than earplugs; I simply will not hear it.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Why would I date a nonchalant man? I like my men how I like my thong.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Cute how I complain that my kids are spoiled when I’m the one who spoils them.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

My card got declined at the barbershop so they put all the hair in my mouth and squeezed me until it came out of my head.

Going viral on Twitch:

It’s weird that Usher doesn’t have any songs about showing people to their seats.

Just shared via Slack:

People will make you sad but cheese will always make you happy. The choice is simple.

Live now on Threads:

The only thing that drains faster than my phone battery is my bank account.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I hope the world needs to be saved from the apocalypse with video game skills so my teen’s entire life won’t have been a complete waste.

Going viral on WeChat:

I was really happy about it being Friday until I realized it was only Wednesday.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Being an adult feels like, “If I can just get through this week, I’ll be okay,” but it’s every damn week.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The real flex is how many wounds you can turn into wisdom.

Lego better be trying to cure child cancer with how much their shit cost.

A storm knows it’s laced with destruction, and yet it rages on.

That sound when you close the cupboard and hear something fall inside, that’s the sound of somebody else’s problem.

“God has a plan for you!” Okay, well, I have some notes for him.

“What’s something you’d tell your younger self?” You can have ice cream for dinner, nobody will stop you.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨