Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Nothing like turning up the volume and pretending you're the lead singer of the world's most exclusive one-person band! 🚗🎶😎 #SoulfulSoloJam"

activity, car, car ride, fun, fun activity, good, health, loud, loud music, mental, mental health, music, relaxation, ride, self-care, solo, soul, yourself

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The next James Bond should be weird. Like he wears a train conductor’s hat and is afraid of balloons.

1 month ago
afraid, balloon, bond, character, conductor, hat, humor, james, James Bond, movie, next, quirky, should, train, train conductor, weird
May your coffee kick in, before reality does.

2 months ago
caffeine, coffee, humor, kick, morning, motivation, reality, wake up
Telling a child not to touch something only ensures that child is definitely now going to touch that something.

1 month ago
advice, behavior, child, curiosity, going, parenting, rules, something, temptation, touch
If reports from this daisy are accurate, she loves me not.

1 month ago
accuracy, accurate, daisy, flower, humor, love, me, relationship, report
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, “Oh no, it’s a cop”?

1 month ago
animals, comedy, cop, dog, dogs, humor, jokes, oh, perspective, police, police dog, regular, think
I don’t follow washing instructions, you’re my clothes you don’t tell me what to do.

1 month ago
clothes, follow, humor, i, independence, instructions, me, rebellion, self-expression, tell, washing, washing instructions

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

You can use an egg timer to tell you when your egg is cooked perfectly. For brown rice you can use a calendar.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Maybe her DMs haven’t been working for 2 months.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

My dental plan is, “I guess I’ll just chew on this side of my mouth from now on.”

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Drinking coffee because hitting people over the head with a shovel is frowned upon.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

Quality women really do attract everyone. A bright light always attracts all types of bugs.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

The problem is I am always the problem.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

The worst thing about having children is the parents of the other children.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Elevators frighten me. I take steps to avoid them.

Just landed via YouTube:

Some people are like “I’m a people pleaser,” and not a single person is pleased with them.

Seen just now on X:

I’m so old that when I take a walk down memory lane, I get lost.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

There’s not gonna be a civil war. None of us can afford to take that much time off work.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Waitress: “Do you have any questions about the menu?” Me: “What kind of font is this?

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I love single sign-on because you only have to sign on once, 8 times a day.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Nobody knows my next move. Not even me.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Car rides by yourself with loud music… they’re good for the soul.

The next James Bond should be weird. Like he wears a train conductor’s hat and is afraid of balloons.

May your coffee kick in, before reality does.

Telling a child not to touch something only ensures that child is definitely now going to touch that something.

If reports from this daisy are accurate, she loves me not.

Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, “Oh no, it’s a cop”?

I don’t follow washing instructions, you’re my clothes you don’t tell me what to do.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

My age no longer permits me to suffer for love, so if you see me sad, it’s due to lack of money.

I just saw someone on TikTok say that the reason the world didn’t end in 2012 is because Psy turned the Honmoon gold with Gangnam Style.

I walk around like everything’s fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.

My outdoor flowers are doing amazing this year because I left them at the garden center where they belong.

I think God’s next test for me should be, “Can he handle a ridiculous amount of money.”

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

If you go by “Toni,” I always think your full name is Rigatoni.

I see why grandmas used to cook dinner at 3 p.m. and sit down the rest of the day.

Your coworker is not hot; they’re just within 10 feet of you 40 hours a week.

Source??? Pattern recognition.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

The more I parent the more convinced I am that the ears on toddlers are purely for decoration.

I’ve realized about a third of my life is spent trying to ignore the fact that I have to pee.

Why is everyone looking for intelligent life in space? Can we please start on Earth first?

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

My head is starting to get dented from hitting rock bottom so often.

Maybe the wolf from The Neverending Story still has nightmares about me, too.

The most incredible thing about James Bond is the way he can walk into any hotel room and immediately know how to use the shower.

Cake hits so much harder off a plastic fork.

I always imagined WWIII would be Earth vs. aliens.

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏

Activity Log ✨

Car rides by yourself with loud music… they’re good for the soul.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

The next James Bond should be weird. Like he wears a train conductor’s hat and is afraid of balloons.

May your coffee kick in, before reality does.

Telling a child not to touch something only ensures that child is definitely now going to touch that something.

If reports from this daisy are accurate, she loves me not.

Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, “Oh no, it’s a cop”?

I don’t follow washing instructions, you’re my clothes you don’t tell me what to do.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏