Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Any time I throw up, I stare at it like I’m getting a message from the past.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

All we needed to be happy in the 90s was music and cigarettes.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

If there is a God and He “loves” us, then explain snakes.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

If you have a Roomba, but don’t dress it up in little outfits, then what are you even doing?

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Just a friendly reminder folks. Don’t forget to set back your rooster this weekend.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

How does spaghetti know that I’m wearing light-colored clothes?

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

I don’t understand construction. Like, how do they know what to do next?

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

My neighbor won’t stop talking about his Rolex and I can’t believe someone stole it tomorrow.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

You are my favorite dirty thought.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Yesterday I really wanted tacos and now I’m eating tacos. Follow your dreams!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,244

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Twitch:

Don’t compare yourself with others. Everyone is better than you.

Spotted on Discord:

If I can’t wash dishes to your album, it ain’t that fire.

Breaking via Instagram:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just sitting on the couch googling if penguins have knees.

Just shared via TikTok:

Me (seductively looking at a potato): would mash.

Shared recently on WeChat:

“At your big age” is one of my favorite insults.

Shared recently on Slack:

Once when I was exercising, I realized that I was allergic to it. I was out of breath, sweating and my heart was racing.

Spotted on YouTube:

Pool rules: You’re not allowed to do anything that begins with the words ‘Hey everyone watch this!’

Trending via Telegram:

I’m going to hell in every religion.

Breaking via Threads:

I know that we aren’t supposed to self diagnose but I’ve googled all of my symptoms and I’m fairly sure I’m a raccoon.

Spotted on Instagram:

Laying in bed with the nervous system of someone going to war.

Every group chat has that one person who never replies, and it’s me.

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Commentary:
When you're in the group chat just for the background noise 🎻😂📴

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Keep the laugh going 😂

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Social Media Stars ⭐

69 shares on WeChat this month:

My transformation into a bitter, angry old woman is almost complete.

26 shares on X this month:

Why is everyone against sugar? Who stood beside you when things went wrong and you were sad? It wasn’t lettuce, for sure.

10 shares on X this month:

This too shall pass. It might pass like a kidney stone. But it will pass.

94 shares on TikTok this month:

It’s really important to stay hydrated at work, so you can take as many 10-minute-long bathroom breaks as possible.

73 shares on WeChat this month:

In the morning: Tired! At lunchtime: Tired! In the evening: Tired! In bed: “Everybody dance now!”

66 shares on Facebook this month:

Stop using ChatGPT. You got a question, you come to me first.

59 shares on Discord this month:

Signed an Executive Order that you have to give me a little forehead kiss.

100 shares on Discord this month:

No kids at my wedding. Gonna Uber the flower girl home when she’s done.

18 shares on Pinterest this month:

It’s important to remember that even parents make mistakes. In fact, it’s how many of us became parents.

52 shares on WhatsApp this month:

This meeting could have been a cake.

Trending Topics 📁

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Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

When I like a woman, I start to gather gifts for her like a squirrel hoarding nuts.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

April fools prank: replace all the sugar in your house with cocaine.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Emotions? No thanks. I’m trying to cut down.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

My skin is so dry it’s doing a PowerPoint presentation.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If a door closes, I’m just going to open it again.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope nobody sees me eating by myself and feels sorry for me. I’m having the time of my life.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I want this laziness removed from my body.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes you show up to work, and they just torture you for hours.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

British people be like “It’s Chewsday, innit?”

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I like my messages, how I like my nuts – MIXED.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,346

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

I was born in the right generation. I love bedrotting and scrolling through Twitter all day.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

Accidentally made eye contact with the sweets at the grocery store and now have to declare bankruptcy.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

The endings of Lost and Game of Thrones each cost me a television.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

I think the world is ready for a fat James Bond.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

They should invent a job that actually wants to hire you after you apply.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

School reunion is a scam… nobody is missing anyone, they just want to know whether you have made it in life or not.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

Eating nothing but beer for a month and calling that Oktoberfast.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

Once you realize I’m an idiot, my posts start to make a lot more sense.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

Snow White and the seven dwarves of the menopause; Itchy, Bitchy, Sweaty, Sleepy, Bloated, Forgetful, and Psycho.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Now that I have a standing desk, I’m adding manual labor to my resume.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

Life is too short. Tell his mom what he did to you.

Making waves on Threads:

Whoever said “Out of sight, out of mind” never had a spider disappear in their bedroom.

Trending via WeChat:

Sometimes uncontrollable laughter is all you need to get the millions of thoughts out of your head.

Trending via Pinterest:

Maybe making another financially irresponsible decision will fix me.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I wish I could Shazam a perfume.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Fun fact: If Celine Dion sang only the vowels in her name, it would be the lyrics to Old McDonalds Farm.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is realizing that the other person is completely stupid.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Do vape shops and nail salons actually make money, or is my town’s economy one big laundering scheme?

Making waves on Threads:

America is truly the best country in the world at not learning from their mistakes.

Shared recently on Twitch:

To think that billions in venture capital have been deployed because it was annoying to copy and paste from ChatGPT.

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