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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

I’m not superstitious because it brings bad luck.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

Objection your honor, if the prosecutor doesn’t have anything nice to say then he shouldn’t say anything at all.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

The closer you are to nature, the further you are from idiots.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

My kids think I’m going to miss them when they leave for college, but I’ll be busy drinking my coffee while it’s still hot.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Someone has left me a voicemail. I don’t know what to do. Open the phone app? The contacts? Do I turn on the TV?

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

It’s amazing to think that a Penguin wrote all of those classic books.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

I finally became a butterfly, and everyone’s already asking what’s next.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

As an outsider, what’s your view on intelligence?

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk to your lock calmly. Because communication is key.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

The only thing I love more than an open mind is an open bar.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

808 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,970

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,970

Updated

28 seconds ago

Users Online

3,422

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

“Just circling back on this.” – “Take another lap.”

Going viral on Threads:

We need to stop telling AI that it’s paintings are bad. That’s how Hitler got started.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Fun fact: The US was originally not meant to be a reality TV show.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Some days you are the table and some days you are the toe.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

That “so we done?” be saving the relationship every time.

Trending via TikTok:

Life is just a vicious cycle of needing to go to the grocery store.

Broadcasted on Threads:

If I’m gonna jingle your bells, I’m definitely gonna jingle them all the way.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Can we take a moment to celebrate the little ride we get in the pneumatic chair at the hair salon or barber when they pump it up or down?

Live now on Pinterest:

Asked my therapist who their therapist was and went to see them. Asked them the same thing until I got to the final boss therapist and defeated them with my trainwreck of a life.

Just shared via WeChat:

This meeting could have been a cake.

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Funny 2030 quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

808 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,970

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,970

Updated

28 seconds ago

Users Online

3,435

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

Baby for sale. Refuses to wear shoes.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

The older I get, the more I understand why deer run in front of cars.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

Establish dominance by eating a salad in front of your indoor plants.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

I can’t sleep good when I know the food is feeling cold in the fridge.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

I’m not lazy, I’m on power saving mode.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

It’s not even a crush. it’s just unsupervised hope.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Play your cards right and we could be wearing matching fanny packs this summer.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Walking into someone’s house with healthy, thriving houseplants everywhere: “Oh, I see you dabble in witchcraft!”

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

I miss the days when our biggest argument was whether West Coast or East Coast rap was better.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

I giggle before I go crazy. Gotta start my engine.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Telegram:

Get a puppy if you are in the market for a best friend who gets you up early so she can bite you excitedly.

Live now on X:

Always be kind. You never know who has subscriptions to your favorite streaming apps.

Seen just now on Slack:

Your opinions are not my business.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

My doctor no longer prescribes me Viagra. He just left me hanging.

Just landed via X:

Welcome to your 40s: here’s ten pounds.

Making waves on Reddit:

Where do cicadas go when they’re not screaming? I’d like to go there and scream.

Live now on YouTube:

I want to learn scuba diving but I’m terrified of the orchestral music in underwater documentaries.

Live now on YouTube:

One of the kids said, “Camping looks fun,” so tonight we’re watching The Revenant.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

My sleeping cycle is completely backwards. In the morning I feel sleepy and at night I can’t fall asleep.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Bag of flesh that acts weird when another bag of flesh doesn’t send symbols on glowing screen.

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