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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

Do you ever wish you could just walk away mid-conversation when you’re bored?

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

Just remember, you don’t need a special reason to buy a cake.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

If you drink a lot of water, you won’t have time for other people’s drama because you’ll be too busy looking for a bathroom.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Aging gracefully is like getting steamrolled gracefully, you should really be screaming.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

GTA6 should have streams and wetlands so we can work to conserve and restore them.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Job interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: I would say my biggest weakness is listening.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

Sometimes a man’s purpose is to simply remind you again and again that you’d be just fine on your own.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

Nice tweets, bro. What medications are you on?

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

When a man likes you, he talks to you every day, and apparently, when you start to like him back, he is very busy and can’t talk at all. That’s how it works.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Twitter is the most fun you can have on the toilet.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,560

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

Just blocked a guy for accusing me of being “all talk”. On Twitter.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Statistically speaking, people don’t object enough at weddings.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I need to stop saying “Oppa Gagnam Style!” to fill in awkward pauses in conversation.

Seen just now on Slack:

My mother still has some really ugly things from the 90s. My older brother, for example.

Just shared via Threads:

Welcome to Twitter, someone from an unhappy home will attend to you shortly.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Every morning I wake up and think I have a hangover, but then I realize I didn’t drink, and this is just how I feel now.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I’m a multi-tasking procrastinator. I can put off multiple things at once.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Later is the best time to do anything.

Trending via YouTube:

The older I get, the more I appreciate people who pretend not to notice me when they see me out in public.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

As I’m cleaning my room, this is a friendly reminder that you actually don’t need that free t-shirt or tote bag from that event.

Funny big heart quotes

New funny big heart quotes 👇

I always need to pee, but it’s just because my heart is so big it pushes on my bladder.

0

4 months ago

always, big, big heart, bladder, bodily, bodily function, exaggeration, function, heart, humor, i, just, need, pee

Someone from 🇬🇶 has recently bookmarked this quote.

91 shares on Telegram this month.

All funny big heart quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on X this month:

“I’d love to go to the moon” I said “but on a full moon day of course, no point going all that way when only half of it’s there”

12 shares on Pinterest this month:

Plot Twist: Your taxes cheated on you.

97 shares on X this month:

If you’re feeling lonely, start a small business. Then you’ll have a little company.

27 shares on Telegram this month:

So why is it that when Star Trek ‘boldly go where no one has gone before’ they always find someone there?

79 shares on Discord this month:

We’d all look younger if we just avoided young people.

92 shares on Instagram this month:

Technically, all restaurants are drive-thru, it just depends how committed to the task you are.

54 shares on Snapchat this month:

I hate when the iPhone corrects ‘Omw’ to ‘On my way!’. Man, I am not that excited.

56 shares on Twitch this month:

By my second “could we change the subject?” I could feel the job interview going south.

36 shares on Pinterest this month:

Limbo is the only sport where being really bad at it means you’re raising the bar.

63 shares on Discord this month:

A beautiful woman should never have to send an email. Yet, such tragedies occur every day.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

These days, I only use Facebook as a birthday calendar.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

And for my next trick, I’m going to miss you in a million unspoken ways.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

“You’ve changed.” Yeah, I watched a new movie.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer and come out wrinkle free?

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

My boss told me to show initiative, so I decided to finish work early.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Drinking through a straw is the opposite of snorkeling.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

Polar lights: when the sky forgets it’s supposed to be boring.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

I need someone to peer pressure me into doing things.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

This year has been the perfect blend between me losing my mind and having the time of my life.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

I love you to the refrigerator and back.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

Going viral on WeChat:

Instead of saying “Good morning,” my wife and I go straight into explanations of how badly we each slept.

Trending via Messenger:

At the beginning of a relationship, people call their partner’s odd behavior “cute little quirks”. Some years later, the police call it “motive”.

Trending via Reddit:

When I said I wanted to be held, I didn’t mean accountable.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Welcome to your 40s. Your eyes are now like a camera someone doesn’t know how to focus.

Going viral on WeChat:

How do I get one of those fake corporate jobs where I work remotely, get paid for responding to one email a day, and have a laptop on with Outlook or whatever open?

Shared recently on TikTok:

Satan: “Would you please stop sacrificing animals to me. I’m not running a zoo down here.”

Making waves on TikTok:

When I was in elementary school, we learned about a shape called a rhombus, and that was the last time I ever heard about that shape ever again.

Just landed via Messenger:

They should invent a Twitter where the timeline doesn’t refresh against your will.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny big heart quotes

New funny big heart quotes 👇

I always need to pee, but it’s just because my heart is so big it pushes on my bladder.

All funny big heart quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨