Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

Friends are God’s way of apologizing to us for our families.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

Going viral on X is like winning a lotto during the apocalypse.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

True bravery is getting a text from a woman with three questions in it, and only responding to one.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

The more nicknames I have for you, the more I like you.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

If anyone wants a more cost effective energy provider, I can supply endless energy on tap from my absolutely not tired child at bedtime.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

Have I made bad decisions when I was drunk? Sure. But have the sober ones been any better? Not really.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

IKEA is like the Hotel California of furniture stores.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

A person’s character can be read quite reliably from the way he or she interacts with service personnel.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

Don’t think of it as losing followers, think of it as frustrating bots to the point they go away.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

As president, I will allow people to use the same password as before when changing their password.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2056 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,218

Funny Quotes Topics

14,965

Funny Quotes Images

12,218

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,443

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Instagram:

Films and television have led me to believe that masquerade balls have a higher mortality rate than most wars.

Seen just now on Discord:

A bad relationship can ruin a good song.

Breaking via Twitch:

I’m glad I have boobs. The last thing I need is people making eye contact with me.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I’ll stop being so lazy when being so lazy stops being so awesome.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Don’t let anyone tell you, you can’t do something. Show them you can’t.

Seen just now on Slack:

I wish someone would light up the way Siri does when I say, “Hey.”

Just shared via YouTube:

There should be a way to take back a compliment bestowed upon a person who doesn’t acknowledge it well.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

They should combine the running of the bulls with Tour de France next year.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

That little pocket on jeans is the perfect size for the money I have left over after I pay all my bills.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I’ll never be badass enough to walk around chewing on a toothpick.

Home » Funny Calorie Deficit Quotes

Funny calorie deficit quotes

New funny calorie deficit quotes 👇

For even more funny calorie deficit quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny calorie deficit quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2056 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,218

Funny Quotes Topics

14,965

Funny Quotes Images

12,218

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,432

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

We need to stop making more Christmas music. We have enough.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

When I tell a joke that doesn’t land, I follow up with a worse one to make my audience realize how good they had it with the first joke.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

Most meetings end with the conclusion that everything needs to be discussed in another meeting.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

I plan the silliest murders in my dreams because all I have to do to get away with it is wake up.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

So apparently they don’t count as sit-ups if you’re just trying to get out of bed.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

Marry the man who treats your dumb questions like they’re NASA-level problems.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

They say time is the solution to every problem. I’ve been waiting for five hours already and the room is still messy.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

None of this matters and we are all going to die. Have a great weekend!

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

Imagine earning a science degree then having to be a meteorologist who announces the prophecy of a groundhog.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

One of the hardest things to do as an adult is to go back to work after a long weekend.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on X:

I’m thinking stuff like “yeah” and also stuff like “yup.”

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Most people don’t listen at all, they just wait until they can continue talking.

Spotted on Threads:

I’m at the age where I won’t make eye contact with someone because they look like a “talker.”

Making waves on TikTok:

Felony Vandalism is a beautiful name for a girl.

Going viral on Discord:

Parents will give you a lecture about fake friends and then get scammed by their own siblings.

Live now on Twitch:

They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

Just landed via Facebook:

When you decorate your whole house for Christmas, what you’re really saying is “I’m not going to dust for at least a month.”

Just landed via Slack:

What is rizz if not swag persevering?!

Going viral on Snapchat:

What did parents do before smart phones, hold their babies with two hands or something?

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I love when someone is telling a story and you can tell even from their version that they’re the villain.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴