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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

America is truly the best country in the world at not learning from their mistakes.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

I switched from coffee to orange juice and told my doctor I felt better. He said it’s the vitamin C and natural sugars, but I think it’s the vodka.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

Your Starbucks order leads me to believe that you’re very difficult to deal with.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Time to get off the internet, I’ve already had enough stupid for the week.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Men want to meet up too easily. What if I plan to sacrifice you?

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

The world would be a better place if mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Mind if I crawl into your DMs and stay there for a while?

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

I hope one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse is single.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,527

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

I took a pole and found that 100% of people in the tent were angry.

Live now on WhatsApp:

The most important meal of the day is the next one.

Just landed via Threads:

Adulthood is just always being tired and wondering how you hurt your back.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

If you’re a man and don’t feel well or are going through something tough, just remember no one cares.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Commenting “AI slop” on a high school acquaintance’s Instagram post of their newborn baby.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Of course I do cardio. It’s called running from my problems.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Why is it that your clothes only get caught on the door handle when you’re in a bad mood?

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Love is like a bird. Sometimes flying around me but then moving on.

Trending via Slack:

I touched grass today, and I’m still like this. Please advise.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

All our dogs think we quit our jobs to spend more time with them. All our cats think we got fired for being lazy.

Funny computer joke quotes

New funny computer joke quotes 👇

Just once, I want a username and password prompt to say: “Close Enough.”

2 weeks ago

close, computer, computer joke, enough, humor, i, interface, joke, just, login, once, password, relatable, say, tech, tech humor, user, user interface, want

All funny computer joke quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Social Media Stars ⭐

91 shares on Facebook this month:

Welcome to your senior years, where you get mad when they rearrange the grocery store.

13 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Time Magazine should have a Worst Person of the Year!

100 shares on Threads this month:

What no one ever considers is that the kids are pretending to believe in Santa for the sake of the parents.

97 shares on Facebook this month:

One minute you’re young and carefree. The next minute you can feel in your knee when it starts to rain.

81 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Still writing the old year on all my ransom notes.

34 shares on Telegram this month:

Remember when we were kids and did everything we could to grow up? We were so stupid!

83 shares on Reddit this month:

Every laptop should have a “cat” button that disables the keyboard so they can nap.

61 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The guy that said laughter is the best medicine obviously wasn’t suffering from diarrhea.

14 shares on X this month:

Call a girl beautiful 1000 times and she won’t notice. Call her fat once and she will never forget. That’s because elephants never forget.

33 shares on YouTube this month:

I actually check my emails every day in hopes I’m going to get some life-changing news someday.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

My workout goals are simple: I’d just like to be able to get up off the floor without looking like a turtle trying to flip itself back over.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

All my passwords are protected, by my poor memory.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

I remember sex. That was cool.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

Whoever has my voodoo doll, if you could take some stuffing out of the midsection and give it a little forehead kiss, that would be great.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Is Mercury in reggaeton?

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

It’s leg day. No, not at the gym, dummy. I’m shaving them.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

Fact: WhatsApp is the most boring app if you’re single.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Googling what ASAP means, and having a panic attack.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

The more stupid the views, the harder it is to talk people out of them.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

I eat cake because it’s somebody’s birthday somewhere.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Threads:

Are you ever in the mood to get hit by a car and spend like one month in the hospital?

Just landed via X:

I didn’t just turn into a grouchy old woman overnight. It took years of people letting me down, pissing me off, and dealing with idiots to get this good at it.

Making waves on Reddit:

Whenever I feel like I hate my job, I remind myself that I could be a food taster for the emperor.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

If you like someone, set them free. If they comeback, it means nobody liked them. Set them free again.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Imagine hating me and I’m just here trying to push a door that says pull.

Live now on Snapchat:

Some days you feel like a hotel light. You’re there, but you don’t have enough energy to really do anything.

Trending via Messenger:

Show dominance by ending the year in bed.

Trending via Slack:

Who else here can say that they have NEVER watched any of the Kardashian shows?

Going viral on Reddit:

If you think about it, Santa really has the best job, he works one day a year and spends the rest of his time judging people.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Long sandwiches should have suitcase handles.

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Funny computer joke quotes

New funny computer joke quotes 👇

Just once, I want a username and password prompt to say: “Close Enough.”

All funny computer joke quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨