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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

Elliott didn’t care about E.T. He just wanted a flying bike.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

“I hate small talk!” Oh okay. Do you think all your grandparents are going to heaven?

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

‘Sex with your ex’ is so stupid. If you want to dwell on the past, you can just buy a history book.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

I just want someone who will treat me like a lady and hold the refrigerator door open for me.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

Britney Spears working at an ice-cream shop called ‘Scoops, I did it again.’

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

Hotel towels are always the worst. So thick and fluffy that I can’t even close my suitcase.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

Nothing tests your patience like a group chat blowing up your phone.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

The human body is amazing. One half-open eye and the brain under emergency power are enough to make coffee.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

I’m terrified of escalators, so I’m taking steps to avoid them.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

If women came with instructions, men wouldn’t read them anyway.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,671

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

Don’t forget to set your clocks back to seasonal depression this weekend.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I just sneezed and farted at the same time. I think my body just took a screenshot.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

My social circle is so small that when the phone rings, I know it’s scammers.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Using a remote to type on a keyboard on the TV is truly one of the worst human experiences that we endure.

Going bananas on X:

We can do things one of two ways. My way or my other way.

Spotted on Telegram:

I’m quitting my job to do topless tarot readings on the beach.

Broadcasted on Slack:

If they don’t look at you like you’re magic, disappear like Houdini.

Going viral on Instagram:

My my husband’s favorite thing is when I blame him for losing something that’s actually in my hand.

Spotted on Facebook:

Co-worker: You look so unapproachable. Me: Yet, here you are.

Just landed via X:

Eight times a day, I ask myself which object in the office will hurt me enough so that I can go home, but at the same time won’t hurt too much.

Funny confinement quotes

Funny confinement quotes bring a burst of laughter to those cozy (or crazy) moments stuck indoors 🏠😂. Whether you’re working from home, quarantined, or just embracing some solo time, these witty lines turn cabin fever into chuckle fever 🤪🎉. Ready to brighten your day with humor that hits close to home? Let’s dive into some hilarious takes on life behind closed doors! 🚪🤣

New funny confinement quotes 👇

All funny confinement quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

53 shares on TikTok this month:

Earth is hard.

41 shares on Instagram this month:

Mama didn’t raise no fool, I turned into one all on my own.

66 shares on Twitch this month:

Good morning to everyone who doesn’t get on my nerves.

37 shares on Reddit this month:

I can’t do the splits. But so far there has never been a situation where I’ve thought, “I should do the splits now.”

28 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I was so excited thinking tomorrow was Friday only to find out it is definitely not Friday.

32 shares on Threads this month:

What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing ‘k’ instead of ‘ok’?

22 shares on Slack this month:

Sometimes it’s the conversations you have with yourself that take the longest.

27 shares on Messenger this month:

Online dating is stupid because scent is such an important factor of attraction.

16 shares on X this month:

I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

44 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Maybe the grass is greener over there because you’re not over there messing it up.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Every time someone tries to fight with me online, a middle finger gets its wings.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Every word wishes it could sound as fun as falafel.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Telling my coworkers I can’t talk in meetings today because I need to save my voice for concerts this weekend.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I enjoy long walks up and down my stairs trying to remember what I was supposed to be doing.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Damn, didn’t win the lottery. It’s messing up my budget plan.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve started rejecting all cookies instead of accepting them. I don’t even know what it means, but I’ve had enough.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

My spirit animal is chasing his own tail.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Just asked this girl Hannah how she spells her name, and she just said, “Two of everything, darling.” Iconic!

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Excuse me, can you direct me to the nonsense?

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Adulthood is just waking up tired one day, and then being tired forever after that.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,538

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

Get married and have kids so that you can Google things like “How to teach your kid to not bite”.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

Bring me a higher love. You have 24 hours. No cops.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

My favorite condiment is Worcestershire sauce. Why? It’s hard to say.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

On the surface: cool as a cucumber. On the inside: squirrel in traffic.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Annoyed because I want to live my life without a job.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and live for 150 years. Lesson learned.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

I know how to use an abacus as a tambourine.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

First they give you butterflies, then mental health problems.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

Hey, if the Earth could stop air frying me, that’d be great.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

Wish my metabolism worked as fast as my anxiety.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WeChat:

Tested positive for needing a kiss.

Trending via Slack:

Having now listened to the entire song, I have to say there’s some obvious internal disagreement as to what the Hokey Pokey is all about.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I’m only dead on the outside.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

“Listen to your body!” Okay, well, my body wants to lay down and eat snacks all day.

Just shared via Slack:

I wonder if people who spend all their time screaming on the internet know there are way more fun things to do.

Just shared via Threads:

Sex is so embarrassing. Like, why did I want to do that to you?

Trending via Snapchat:

But if I get tinted windows, how will people see me flipping them off?

Going viral on YouTube:

I don’t wanna start the year with any negativity so if you and I have had issues in the past, apologize to me immediately.

Just shared via Reddit:

Living your life to the fullest does not have to involve selfies with bison.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

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