Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

When I die and y’all go through my search history, you’ll be disappointed to find mostly just definitions for very common words that I wasn’t sure I was using correctly.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I learned to dance: waiting for the bathroom.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

One year closer to whatever age my obituary will say.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

I walked into a holiday party, saw someone else already playing with the dog, and realized they’d stolen my entire social strategy.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

I need to be more disciplined and stop procrastinating, starting tomorrow.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

My favorite part about summer is when I get to go back inside where it’s air conditioned.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

I need you to put the fun in refund!

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

It’s not sleeping alone if there are crumbs in your bed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,444

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Fellas, if your lady is mad, ask her if it’s because she’s put on some weight. That’ll calm her down.

Just shared via Instagram:

My husband is trying to convince me that we’re in a situationship. “The situation is that we live in the same house and love each other.”

Spotted on Instagram:

I remember when Britain used to be so rich, you’d be embarrassed to go into a Lidl or Aldi.

Going viral on X:

I’m so vulnerable to nostalgia. The sun will go down and I’ll be like: “Wow… remember when the sun was up… I miss who I was then”

Broadcasted on TikTok:

When I say I’m tired, the “of people” is silent.

Just shared via Twitch:

They were called “TV programs” because they were literally programming us, bro.

Going bananas on X:

“We will go ahead and make these changes if we don’t hear from you before Friday” is such an elegant way to solve problems.

Just landed via Threads:

“I’d rather hurl myself into an active volcano!” -me, politely declining dates.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

My friend says to me, “What rhymes with orange?” And I told him, “No, it doesn’t.”

Going viral on Messenger:

Roses are red, tacos are delicious. I use paper plates, ’cause I hate doing dishes.

Funny dusting quotes

Funny dusting quotes bring a sprinkle of laughter to your cleaning routine 🧹✨ Whether you’re battling stubborn dust bunnies or just pretending to be productive, these witty lines add a spark of joy to chores 😄💨 Get ready to dust off the boredom and sweep in some smiles with humor that’s as refreshing as a clean countertop! 🧽🎉

New funny dusting quotes 👇

All funny dusting quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

41 shares on Slack this month:

Gentle parenting is making sure your kids can’t hear what you say when you’re peeling a mango.

88 shares on Reddit this month:

Our pronunciation of the word “colonel” does feel like group psychosis.

65 shares on TikTok this month:

Due to personal reasons, I will be screaming into a pillow.

35 shares on Pinterest this month:

Are you coming to the party? There will be noise and lights but I found a corner for us to hide.

34 shares on Facebook this month:

Hate it when I pull out a winter coat and there’s no money stashed in it.

62 shares on Snapchat this month:

Asked my therapist who their therapist was and went to see them. Asked them the same thing until I got to the final boss therapist and defeated them with my trainwreck of a life.

47 shares on Telegram this month:

I need the youth to start reading. Even if it’s the tag on your underwear. Read it.

56 shares on TikTok this month:

Karma has taught me to never laugh at a stranger being attacked by a seagull.

35 shares on Twitch this month:

Sorry, can’t. The pears I bought a couple days ago have ripened.

96 shares on Twitch this month:

Yoga is just slow motion breakdancing.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

My OnlyFans is just hours of me untangling Christmas lights.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I have read that there are imaginary pregnancies. The belly gets bigger and bigger, but there is no baby inside. Finally a diagnosis.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Interviewer: Why do you want to work in customer service? Me: Well, I’m really good at apologizing for things that aren’t my fault.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I need a new hobby that costs zero dollars and takes up 100% of my free time. So far, all I’ve come up with is mowing the lawn.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Violence is not the answer, unless you’re a gaggle of children instructed to break into a piñata.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

This entire year has been the Nightmare Before Christmas.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Could someone please come over here and be the adult? I’m too tired.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Standing like a flamingo at my kitchen counter eating watermelon is such a vibe.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Not all works of art are in a museum. I, for example, am lying on the couch at home.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Your in his DMs, I’m on Etsy paying a witch to put a spell on him.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,379

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

The gap in my resume is because I was trying to reach enlightenment for 5 years.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

I’m going to die from jealousy one day.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

Humble enough to know I can be replaced, but wise enough to know ain’t nobody else like me.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

It may look like I’m doing nothing, but in my head I’m quite busy.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

There’s protein in foods that have never been protein before.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

First date idea: I lean in close and surprise you with a wet willy.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Seems like the ‘how to use a fire extinguisher’ video on YouTube shouldn’t have a 30-second ad before it.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

Self-awareness is such a two-edged sword. Like, yay, I know myself better, but at what cost?

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

I’ve got midlife crises older than you.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Slack:

Wanna perform obscene blood rituals under the full moon, or nah?

Going viral on Threads:

I accidentally said “large” instead of “venti” at Starbucks and now the cops are here.

Just landed via Messenger:

No one tells you that the older you get, the more often you check your weather app.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Due to unforeseen circumstances, I will be acting weird today.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Born to be a Jedi spinning a lightsaber, forced to work full-time and pay rent.

Breaking via Twitch:

Cleaning a house with children in it is like shoveling snow on the North Pole.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

“Likes your story” is a declaration of love.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

“Still gangsta” I whisper to myself as I drink my chamomile tea with a heating pad on my back.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Dissecting an alien and getting bitterly jealous at their crazy organs.

Shared recently on Discord:

I forgot to sweep up some crumbs earlier, and I just heard an ant moaning in pleasure as he discovered the bounty.

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