Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

Unfortunately for the both of us, I really like you.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

Despite popular opinion, dating apps are NOT for dating. They are for finding people to watch your Instagram story for years and years.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at social gatherings.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, then you love a boomerang.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Got me some lemons now for the cold. I hope the tequila helps.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

Welcome to your 40s, you’re too old to sit on the floor and put furniture together.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

I’ll make you feel safe in that you’ll know you can outrun me if we are being chased by a murderer.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

If I was a Spice Girl I would be Mild to Medium Spice.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

The quickest way to double your money is to hold it in front of a mirror.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

Sorry I slowed down but I had to calculate if the bridge could hold the weight of my car with all the stuffed animals my kids insisted on bringing on vacation.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1816 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,978

Funny Quotes Topics

14,785

Funny Quotes Images

11,978

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,427

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I hate when people can’t let go of the past. Debt collectors are the worst.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

They should remove the sex scenes from movies and then put them all into one big super sex scene movie they can show in theaters at the end of the year.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Who needs a weighted blanket when you’ve got the weight of the world?

Just shared via Instagram:

I miss when my biggest problem was whether my Happy Meal toy matched the one from the commercial.

Making waves on Threads:

You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.

Breaking via YouTube:

Perks of dating me: you will be the hot one.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Called in, “I can either stay home today and learn to play this accordion or bring it in with me. Your call.”

Trending via Messenger:

I’m not good with plants or people, but I am good with books and buffets.

Spotted on Instagram:

You are what you eat! (If anyone needed more encouragement to eat the rich.)

Home » Funny Eta Quotes

Funny ETA quotes

New funny ETA quotes 👇

For even more funny ETA quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny ETA quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1816 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,978

Funny Quotes Topics

14,785

Funny Quotes Images

11,978

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,453

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

A few months after the wedding, Cinderella’s husband began to complain about her having too many shoes.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

In case any nudes of me should appear somewhere: It was very cold that day.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

McDonald’s is finally promoting good health by making their food unaffordable.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

Can I come over and look at your Hot Wheels collection?

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

Men are like dogs. They’re actually cute, but having my own would be too much work for me.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it’s too late for them to back out.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

Girls will be like, “This is my comfort song,” and it’s the howling of a wolf inside a dark forest.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

I’m at the “buy bigger jeans” part of my Eat. Pray. Love. journey.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

You’ll be having a good day and then someone your age says they’re buying a house.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

If I ever go missing, please print my picture on wine bottles and not on milk boxes. My friends are more likely to find me then.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Reddit:

I don’t know why everyone wants love like in the movies. A movie is only 2 hours.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Dry January is so funny. People are like, “How can I make the worst month of the year even worse?”

Trending via Messenger:

Not only is it not Friday, but it’s not even Thursday.

Just landed via Pinterest:

It’s crazy that we’re closer to the year 3000 then I am to finding love.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful.

Breaking via TikTok:

What is that job called where you put the little stickers on fruit? I think I would be good at that.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Sorry I was late, I was waiting for my CVS receipt to finish printing.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Hey, you wanna come to a wedding with me? You could be the groom.

Seen just now on Threads:

Narcissus fell in love with his own image, but was immediately annoyed at how it always tried to talk while he was talking.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

They say there’s no such thing as a stupid question, but then they’ll go and wake you up to ask if you’re asleep.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴