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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

Maybe this is the Windows software update that changes everything for me.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

Jeez. It’s like the people in this nursing home have never heard techno before.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Did it make you feel powerful when you didn’t let me merge onto the highway?

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

So does everybody have a collection of grocery bags that you keep inside of a grocery bag?

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

When I said there’s no such thing as a dumb question, I didn’t expect them to take it as a personal challenge.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Netflix and chi…cken nuggets.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

I’m not speaking to my husband, and I don’t think he even knows it.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

The real anti-aging regimen is retaining your childlike wonder and whimsy.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

What’s a beginner hobby for someone just getting into being happy?

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Hansel and Gretel weren’t wrong, every bad decision I’ve ever made started with being hungry.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

3,668

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

We should start referring to age as “levels.” So when you’re level 80, it sounds a lot cooler than just being an older person.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Date night idea: fight another couple.

Trending via Facebook:

Always keep a bottle of wine in the fridge for special occasions. Like Wednesday.

Trending via Messenger:

Roses are red, tacos are delicious. I use paper plates, ’cause I hate doing dishes.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Pinterest algorithm is like a loving dad who fills the whole fridge with oranges after seeing you enjoy one.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Oh, that’s nothing a sudden burst of completely disproportionate rage won’t solve.

Making waves on Facebook:

How you conduct yourself when using plastic wrap is the real you.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I changed my password to ‘incorrect’ so whenever I forget it, the computer tells me it’s incorrect, and I’m like, ‘Wow, you didn’t have to be so rude about it.’

Just landed via YouTube:

My wife bought new towels and they’re different colors, so I know the entire color scheme of my house is about to change.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Caffeine isn’t cutting it anymore. I need to eat a gun.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

3,678

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

It’d be nice if my bank account filled up as quickly as my laundry basket.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

I’m glad nobody can see the face I make when I’ve just started the washing machine and then spot a sock on the floor.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

UNO is based on luck unless I win, then it’s based on strategy, and I’m a genius.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can’t eat or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Men love when you ask them to explain something to you. It is considered a sign of deep respect in their culture.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Most people who have found themselves are amazed to discover that there is nothing there at all.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

My four moods: I’m too old for doing that. I’m too tired for doing that. I’m too sober for doing that. I don’t have time for doing that.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Good things take time, that’s why I’m always late.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

After all these years, Jude Law has finally noticed me and responded to my love letters. Something about staying 500 feet away. I’m getting it framed.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

I don’t care about life on other planets. I don’t even have a life on this one.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Easiest way to ragebait a finance bro is to start the ‘why can’t we print more money’ conversation.

Live now on Facebook:

Obviously, I’m gonna upload pictures with filters and in my best angles. If you wanna see the ugly side of me, come to my house, but bring ice cream.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

When the moon hits your eye like it’s 5:45, that’s November.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

A simple “hi” can be the beginning of two years of therapy.

Just landed via X:

I don’t follow washing instructions, you’re my clothes you don’t tell me what to do.

Shared recently on Telegram:

That “meeting canceled” ping is a gift from the Gods.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

It feels like a million o’clock right now.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I’m not lazy, I’m waiting for inspiration to hit me… should be here any time now.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

If there was an award for staying at home, I’d win and then send someone else to pick it up for me.

Making waves on Messenger:

If you can’t look back at your younger self and realize that you were an idiot, you are probably still an idiot.

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