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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

I just come here for the free life advice and inspirational quotes from people who’s lives are complete train wrecks.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

On one hand, it’s terrible to not have access to the Internet, but on the other hand, it’s terrible to have access to the Internet.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

I was neglecting my root chakra at the time, your honor.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Girls take a picture of their legs in a bubble bath and say “guess where I am”. The library?

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

Let’s all stand up against iron deficiency (but not too fast).

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

I can’t really explain it but cereal at night tastes better than cereal in the morning.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

DMs full of guys who wouldn’t know what to do with me.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

You don’t have to write every day to be a writer! You just have to feel guilty every day that you don’t.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

I once let a really short guy be the big spoon and it felt like I went to bed with a backpack on.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

I have this rare skin disease called perfect.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,994

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,994

Updated

18 minutes ago

Users Online

3,449

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

It’s been too long since I partook in shenanigans.

Trending via Pinterest:

Husband and I were blissfully happy for 25 years. Then we met.

Live now on Snapchat:

I was talking to someone and combined “all good” and “no worries” by saying “all worries”, which was a lot more accurate.

Just landed via X:

How my weekend was? Light, dark, light, dark, Monday.

Trending via Threads:

All day I think about sleep but when it’s time to go to bed I don’t wanna.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I just need a little time to warm up to you, and then I’ll be super fun, I promise—1-2 years at most.

Reported on Pinterest:

Celery is depressing green water wafers.

Live now on Pinterest:

Kinda messed up that the government knows my birthday but never sends me a gift or anything.

Trending via Instagram:

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out all I wanted is paychecks.

Spotted on Messenger:

Dear Aliens, Now would be a good time. Thanks!

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,994

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,994

Updated

18 minutes ago

Users Online

3,433

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

I wonder if babies know that we are more terrified of them than they are of us.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 40s. Your bra wins the Oscar for the best actor in a supportive role.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

I’m really looking forward to eight hours of thinking about sleep tonight.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

I was at the cemetery when a little kid walked up to me and said she was afraid. I took her hand and told her that I used to be afraid too… when I was alive.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

They should combine the running of the bulls with Tour de France next year.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Shoutout to everyone who works hard to support their dog’s extravagant lifestyle.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Telling my coworkers I can’t talk in meetings today because I need to save my voice for concerts this weekend.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

Being friends with introverts is hard sometimes. Did they die? Are they just recharging? Are they Batman now? The suspense is killing me.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

You’re in his DMs, I’m outside his window with a JBL speaker streaming Taylor Swift.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

I start each day assuming it will be horrible and go from there.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on LinkedIn:

My childhood led me to believe that as an adult I’d have to contend with truth serum, lava, quicksand, trap doors, and secret passageways. So far it’s mostly been weight gain and existential dread.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Just bought 4 pounds of cherries like I’m in some math problem.

Making waves on Reddit:

At my size, I’d be called Buffet the Vampire Slayer.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I know I seem a little crazy sometimes, but that’s because I AM.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I can relate to God because it also takes me a full week to finish something that still kind of sucks.

Seen just now on Slack:

Nothing is smaller than the X on ads to click them away.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I think it’s sad that getting married is one of the only ways to guarantee somebody will be forced to make a speech about how great you are.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Waffles are just pancakes with abs.

Going viral on YouTube:

Friends with consequences.

Going viral on Slack:

Do you think I’ll read a book again at some point or will I continue to dumb myself down with 12 hours of screen time?

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