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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

I love reaching into my messy bag looking for something and everyone around me hears like glass breaking and bombs going off and a cat meowing from inside there.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

The only running I do is to chase the ice cream truck.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Still can’t believe we have a federal holiday to celebrate the 1996 hit movie Independence Day.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

What, and I cannot stress this enough, day is it.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Ain’t no way there’s billions of us and nobody got superpowers.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

Think about how many more lovers you’d have if a cross country high-speed rail existed. That’s what they are taking away from you.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Unfollowing girls on Instagram as soon as they get a boyfriend is something I’ll never stop doing.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Spoiler alert: Monday doesn’t care about your feelings.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

If you like water, you already like 72% of me.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Due to personal reasons, I’ll be turning you into a poem.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,994

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,994

Updated

2 hours ago

Users Online

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Discord:

Ever looked at your ex and wondered, was I drunk the entire relationship?

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Stop making eye contact with me, I can’t afford a wedding right now.

Seen just now on Instagram:

The internal struggle between wanting to be productive and just wanting to nap all day.

Shared recently on Slack:

I’m only here while I wait for that Nigerian prince to follow through on his end of the bargain.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I appreciate the sun for always moving in the sky in a predictable way but I also respect the moon for just kind of doing whatever.

Just landed via X:

I’ve realized there’s more to life than social media, so I guess this is goodbye for the next 12 minutes.

Making waves on X:

See you when you get home from school, I whisper to my kid’s apple.

Shared recently on Discord:

I support robot taxis. How else are robots supposed to get around?

Just shared via Discord:

Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this makes no sense, microwave.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

When you have intense chemistry with someone, everyone else feels so bleh.

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Funny investigative quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,994

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,994

Updated

2 hours ago

Users Online

3,419

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

They should release the Epstein list right before the Oscars.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

Once again, I have fallen for life’s biggest scam: being two hours early for a flight only for security to take roughly seven minutes.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

I can see the appeal of golf, the only sport where the winner is the one who does the least.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

If I ever had to fight a bear, I hope it’s a gummy bear.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

Adulthood is saying “but after this week things will slow down a bit” over and over until you die.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Blackout curtains because I’ll decide what time it is.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

Your life can’t fall apart if you never had it together.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

If a man says he’ll fix it, he will fix it. There’s no need to remind him every six months.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

I’m not a good fit for the traditional job market because my greatest strengths are challenging authority, being self-righteous, and wanting to go home.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

Please no requests for a threesome. If I want to disappoint two people at the same time, I’ll visit my parents.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Facebook:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I love when someone is like “I’m funny because I have trauma and it’s a coping mechanism” and it’s like “Okay, not to add to your trauma, but you’re not funny!”

Breaking via YouTube:

Today, I want to talk about underperforming continents. Antarctica, explain yourself.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Don’t ever get excited if your kid likes a new food. They won’t like it tomorrow.

Live now on WeChat:

My fairytale would be called the princess and the pea sized bladder.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

Spotted on TikTok:

Twitter is the most fun you can have on the toilet.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I’m not asking for a lot, I just want someone down to earth that’s gonna touch me all over like my shower curtain does.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Why are poets thinking that they are the ones tortured and not those who read their poetry?

Just landed via Instagram:

I don’t like how monkeys have taken ownership of the whole banana thing. I bet I like bananas almost as much as they do.

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