Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Shazam, but for whatever the hell goes on in the apartment upstairs.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

This heat made me realize I won’t survive in hell, I gotta change.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

Forget carrying me to bed; carry me to the end of the workweek. Then we can talk.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

I’ve been blocked by better.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

Summer body? Folks, I’m cosplaying as a potato that’s seen some things.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

When people say I don’t mean to brag, they’re bragging about not bragging.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

What an embarrassing time to be alive.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Once when I was exercising, I realized that I was allergic to it. I was out of breath, sweating and my heart was racing.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

Mail is crazy because it’s like 99 pieces of straight up garbage and 1 that if you don’t reply to you’re going to jail.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

The egg doesn’t swim to the sperm, girl. Never chase a man.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,496

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

Rich people don’t put their couches against their wall. I moved my couch into the middle of the floor and still haven’t gotten rich. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong here.

Just shared via Facebook:

“Bluetooth or Insane?” is a fun game we all play when we see a lone person speaking out loud in public.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Obviously, I’m gonna upload pictures with filters and in my best angles. If you wanna see the ugly side of me, come to my house, but bring ice cream.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I need a room full of mirrors because I want to be surrounded by winners.

Just shared via Instagram:

If history is repeating itself, when can I buy a pet dinosaur?

Going viral on Instagram:

My body is a temple. An ancient, creaky temple with questionable plumbing.

Just landed via WeChat:

I’m only drinking a lot of beer tonight because I need the room in the fridge.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

My superpower is holding onto stuff for years and throwing it away exactly one week before I need it.

Going viral on YouTube:

Robot bartender rips me in half after listening to my problems for over an hour.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

As a child, I had the impression that I would be offered free drugs by strangers much more frequently than the 0 times it’s happened.

Funny legally quotes

Funny legally quotes bring a hilarious twist to the serious world of law ⚖️😂 Whether you’re a lawyer, student, or just love clever wordplay, these witty gems will have you chuckling in no time 🤓📚 From courtroom antics to legal loopholes, get ready to smile while exploring the lighter side of justice! 😄👩‍⚖️✨

New funny legally quotes 👇

All funny legally quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on Discord this month:

Australia is like someone’s still playing Jumanji.

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I should go to jail so I can focus on the gym.

49 shares on TikTok this month:

I have been so toxic and horny lately, I should probably start, like, reading a book or something.

89 shares on Telegram this month:

For Halloween, you should be mine.

97 shares on Threads this month:

You know what’s worse than someone’s phone alarm playing the tune over and over? Someone else who starts whistling along.

22 shares on Instagram this month:

Leaving my apartment for two weeks, but leaving a single cup in the sink as a gesture to continuity upon my return.

18 shares on X this month:

Until further notice the days of the week are now called thisday, thatday, otherday, someday, yesterday, today and nextday!

43 shares on Reddit this month:

My comments on your home decor are not criticisms, they are deep concerns.

94 shares on Snapchat this month:

Peer pressure has nothing on me; all my bad decisions are made single-handedly.

73 shares on Facebook this month:

(to the boys in the yard) I hope you brought your own milkshake.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I have this ability where I can look at someone’s profile picture and determine whether they are evil or not.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Fun fact: the creator of Barbie and the creator of Hot Wheels were husband and wife.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’m not ordering fries, I’ll just eat some of yours!” -Former friends of mine

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I was so locked in, to the point where we were tongue-kissing with morning breath.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

If you ask him what he admires most about a woman and he says brains, you’ve got yourself a zombie.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Oligarchy sounds like something you dip your breadstick in at the olive garden.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m a social media influencer in that I’ve influenced people to ignore me on social media.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

My psych professor asked if we’d heard of Pavlov. I said, “It rings a bell.” No one laughed; I’m too witty for this class.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

People think I’m a minimalist, but I’m just broke.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,465

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

I could never journal, I’d start lying in there too.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

Getting a nose ring, so I don’t lose my keys.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Explaining myself is too much work. Please just judge me.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

Saying “shut up” before skipping the YouTube ad is literally necessary.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

I’d end my life from loneliness before I ever talk to ChatGPT like it’s my friend.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

My step counter doesn’t judge. For him, steps to the fridge are just as valuable as a walk.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

My dogs don’t feel earthquakes because they have constant gas.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

Dear Apple, at no point will I ever text someone “he’ll yeah” ..

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

Job interview: Where do you see yourself in five years? Me: Hopefully on a sabbatical.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Going from summer clothes to winter clothes: “Okay!” Going from winter clothes to summer clothes: “I AM NOT READY!”

Going bananas on Discord:

At the first signs of a sore throat, you should be given the option of just skipping four days into the future.

Shared recently on Slack:

Every frozen pizza is a canvas that needs an artist’s touch.

Breaking via TikTok:

Just bought a new umbrella for the person that finds it tomorrow.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Brave of you to assume you can resist my good looks.

Making waves on WeChat:

The retirement age needs to be lowered to 40, I’ve had enough.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Unfortunately, when you don’t burden people with your problems, they assume you don’t have any. Lol.

Going viral on WeChat:

Coffee tastes so much better handed to me.

Spotted on YouTube:

My Mom asks why everything is on the floor, like she never heard of gravity.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

That was the last cup of coffee in my life. From tomorrow I’ll be drinking straight from the pot.

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