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Updated: Jun 2, 2026

 

 

 

 

 

20 Funny makeup quotes

Funny makeup quotes 💄✨ bring all the laughs and glam together! Whether you’re a lipstick lover 💋 or a contour queen 👑, these witty sayings add a splash of humor to your beauty routine. Perfect for sharing with your makeup squad or brightening up your day, they prove that makeup isn’t just about looking good—it’s about having fun and expressing yourself with a smile 😄💅. Get ready to LOL while you glow!

Fifteen years ago, makeup was all powders and dusts. But now, it’s all goo and liquid. From this, I can infer that by 2040, it will all be made of pigmented gases.

Posted onMay 28, 2026

Women’s skincare is so confusing. Am I supposed to look shiny and sweaty, or matte like cement?

Posted onMay 27, 2026

The biggest first-world problem is having your favorite makeup product be discontinued.

Posted onMay 27, 2026

For a guy with no reflection, Dracula’s eyeliner is always flawless.

Posted onMay 27, 2026

You gotta act cool, calm, and collected around liquid eyeliner because it can sense your fear.

Posted onMay 26, 2026

I left the house with wet hair and no makeup on, so I’m sure I’ll run into everyone I know.

Posted onMay 26, 2026

Failed relationships can be described as so much wasted make-up.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

Posted onMay 25, 2026

I always wonder who makes a more stupid face: women putting on make-up or men shaving?

Posted onMay 24, 2026

Is it smoky eye or were you wearing mascara and your eyes got itchy?

Posted onMay 23, 2026

Hiring a mortician to do my makeup while I sleep.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

Instead of hairstyles and make-up, there should be YouTube tutorials on polite behavior.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

I think Cinderella should have lived a happy life with all her animal friends rather than settle for a man who had her try on a shoe because he didn’t recognize her without makeup.

Posted onMay 23, 2026

Tried to pull off a smokey eye, ended up looking like I went three rounds with McGregor.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

My husband said I use a lot of makeup, so I showed him some makeup tutorials on TikTok and I don’t think he’ll be making that mistake again.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

What many call beauty can just be wiped off 90% of the time.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

Humans should grow a new set of teeth in our 30s to make-up for all the poor decisions in our 20s.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

One of the benefits of being my friend is that you can come to my house in your pajamas, no make-up, and look like crap and I won’t judge you.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

I would cry but my makeup is too expensive.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

I love when lashes make me look evil.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

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