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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

I’m forming a Wham! cover band with 3 other bald guys called Hairless Whisper.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Me, adding fuel to the fire: I’m just here to help.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Italians, look away now. I break my spaghetti in half before I cook it.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

Hey (threateningly), can I join your years-old, tight-knit, close friend group?

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

I get sad whenever they’re mean to Zoidberg in Futurama.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

I like people who make me forget that I’m shy.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

Don’t wait for later to eat the cake. Do it now, before another mammal of your household finds it.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

When pregnant women are around, watch what you say. Nowadays, anything will be used as a name.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

All I’m saying is that big burgers should be wider not taller.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

It’s crazy I need a certificate to prove I was born when you can literally just look at me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1506 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,668

Funny Quotes Topics

14,534

Funny Quotes Images

11,668

Updated

55 seconds ago

Users Online

3,449

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Slack:

You know shit’s about to get real when I put on yoga pants before dessert.

Broadcasted on Discord:

I hope I don’t die of something stupid like old age, I want a piano to fall on my head.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Just because your parents planned you doesn’t mean you weren’t a mistake.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Sometimes a little rudeness to establish that you don’t fancy nonsense is really important.

Shared recently on Reddit:

So I got a call from a telemarketer, and he said he couldn’t understand me. I told him, “Press 1 for English.”

Trending via TikTok:

If you’re lost in the woods, start talking loudly about politics. Someone will come to argue with you.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I’ve learned two important things in life, I can’t remember the first one, but the second one is to write everything down.

Just shared via Instagram:

I hope you can hear me thinking about you.

Making waves on Facebook:

A word to the wise ain’t necessary, it’s the stupid ones who need advice.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

What can I buy my wife for Valentine’s Day that finally proves to her once and for all that I have absolutely no idea what she likes or who she is?

Home » Funny Mind Games Quotes

Funny mind games quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1506 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,668

Funny Quotes Topics

14,534

Funny Quotes Images

11,668

Updated

55 seconds ago

Users Online

3,434

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

No one buys my theory that red fire hydrants are filled with ketchup and yellow fire hydrants are filled with mustard.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

My mom sent me a text message so long I had to refill my Adderall prescription to read it.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

Guys only want one thing and it’s my grandmother’s meatball recipe.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

I’ve faced more peer pressure to watch certain TV shows than to do drugs.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

That uncle or aunt who kept their distance from the rest of the family will start making more sense as you get older.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

If you’re dating an alpha female, you need to know that they need to be babied at night, or else they will turn into a dragon.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

The most incredible thing about James Bond is the way he can walk into any hotel room and immediately know how to use the shower.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

Shoutout to coughing on the bus. Haven’t tried it myself but seems really popular.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

How to write complaints: “Dear customer service, first of all, you should know that I am typing this with my middle finger.”

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

When they know you know they did you dirty, they stay gone. And that’s the best thing.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Slack:

Double chins are better than double faces.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Apple, who gives you permission to turn the brightness down again when I’ve just turned it up?

Going viral on Threads:

Every guy wants to be called Daddy till that test comes back positive.

Breaking via WeChat:

My birthday wish is for everyone to ignore my birthday.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I always take responsibility for my actions when there is no one else around to blame.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

According to this box of macaroni and cheese, I am an entire family.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I am not someone you have to entertain if you invite me, because I will have canceled.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Good morning to everyone except the baristas who don’t tighten the lid.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Home is where the tap water doesn’t taste funny.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I can now tell the hour of the day by which part of my body needs a heating pad.

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