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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

“You live and you learn!” Bro, I don’t want to do either of those things.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

I bought a calming tea but the smell and taste is making me nervous.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

Why would I spend money on the zoo when I can watch my colleagues for free?

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

Saw a guy reading a book and writing notes in it. Not enough words in there for ya, bud?

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

I hope we get the nice AI that enslaves us and makes us their pets and not the bad AI that enslaves us to mine lithium or something.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

When you’re feeling down, just turn up the music a little louder.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Hey, sorry I can’t go out tonight. I already showered and got into bed, and now I’m busy rubbing my feet together like a little grasshopper.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

The note on this boxed wine says ‘Fresh up to 6 weeks after opening’. 6 weeks. Lol.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

Everyone’s a gangster until their doorbell rings.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

Just thinking how many animals we had to ride on before we realized horses were ok with it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,586

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Threads:

When I was young, I was afraid of the dark. Now, these bills got me afraid of the light.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the best thirst trap poster of them all?

Going viral on Snapchat:

I’m so thankful I had a childhood before technology took over.

Going viral on Discord:

To everyone who wrote “stay cool” in my year book, I have some devastating news.

Spotted on Instagram:

What’s your favorite song about a white boy playing funky music?

Freshly posted on Facebook:

You were there at the beginning of the Internet if you’ve heard the following: “Get off the web, I need to make a call!”

Seen just now on Messenger:

Fun prank: make people study for many years, and then don’t give them jobs.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Airplanes are so weird because how does a giant metal box stay in the air like that, and why am I craving tomato juice?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Why is the Formula 1 so afraid of rain? Just drive with more caution. That’s what I always do when it rains.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Hey Grok, scan through all my mutuals and find me a girlfriend, thanks!

Funny neutral quotes

Funny neutral quotes bring a perfect blend of wit and balance 😄⚖️—no taking sides, just pure amusement! They’re ideal for those moments when you want to keep things light and clever without stirring the pot 🎭✨. Ready to laugh without the drama? Dive into the world of humor that stays right in the middle, making everyone smile 😊🎉!

New funny neutral quotes 👇

All funny neutral quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on Reddit this month:

GTA6 should have streams and wetlands so we can work to conserve and restore them.

56 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Me watching any modern ad: How is this ad an ad for the thing it’s an ad for?

18 shares on TikTok this month:

What an embarrassing time to be alive.

49 shares on Pinterest this month:

For my next trick, I’ll watch a two-hour movie in four.

51 shares on TikTok this month:

If paying a cashier a living wage will make prices go up, why doesn’t replacing cashiers with self-checkouts make prices go down?

47 shares on Pinterest this month:

Why is bacon called bacon and cookies called cookies if you cook bacon and bake cookies?

16 shares on Snapchat this month:

I miss when men had big hair, louder feelings, and leaned over cars to declare their love.

78 shares on Discord this month:

Being a people pleaser that no one is pleased with is the main cause of my anxiety.

95 shares on Slack this month:

Call me a glitch, cause I’m definitely messing with your system.

15 shares on Slack this month:

Never faked an orgasm before, but the joy of ugly presents.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

If a stranger starts talking to me in an elevator I say “I don’t want to talk in case we get stuck and I have to eat you” that usually shuts them up.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

My dogs don’t feel earthquakes because they have constant gas.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Special Offer: Save 100% when you don’t buy anything.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter is cool because you can figure out what’s going on in the world through memes instead of watching the news.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Does anyone know what to do, like in general?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

People don’t catch bullets with their teeth anymore, get out there and practice.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter is a weapon of mass distraction.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Life would be so much simpler if you could just smack the stupid out of people instead having to reason with them.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Stop trying to be liked by everybody. You don’t even like everybody.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Hey boy, are you my period? Because you’re annoying as hell but I still wanna see you regularly.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,695

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

I just think we should kiss. And kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss. But that’s just me.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Working with children gives you so much in return. Lice, for example.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Pro tip: When you sign up for anything online, put the website’s name as your middle name. Now, when you receive spam, you will know who sold your data.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

Why did they call it K-pop and not Seoul music?

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

Sorry I’m late. I was scraping the clearance tag off your Christmas present.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

I only squeak when I’m squoken to.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Took a break from Twitter for my mental health, so I’d figure I’d come back to ruin it again.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

“So if I had kids, my kids would never…” Spoiler: Yes, they would.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

If you’re looking for another bad decision, I’m here.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

I am so lucky that I can’t tell the difference between a heartfelt compliment and sarcastic disdain. Life is much easier when you’re dumb.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

No, don’t worry about him, babe. That’s just my soulmate.

Going bananas on Slack:

Kids be like: “Nice bathroom mirror. It would be a shame if I spat toothpaste all over it.”

Breaking via Instagram:

Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Everyone’s a gangster until they have to say sorry.

Breaking via Telegram:

I used to think I was indecisive, but I’m not too sure any more.

Live now on TikTok:

We don’t get a song of the summer this year because we were bad.

Just shared via X:

This December is not Decembering like the other Decembers Decembered.

Going viral on X:

I find that age is just a number, and the older you get, the number you get.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Once again, I was not nominated for an Oscar this morning for acting my way through life.

Going bananas on WeChat:

What song lyric resonates with you the most? Mine is “we’re tiny, we’re toony, we’re all a little loony”

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