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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

IKEA products should be cheaper, I’m doing all the work here. It’s like ordering takeout food and still having to cook it when it arrives.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

If he has other girls who make him smile, be different and make him cry.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Depression is embarrassing because sometimes it makes you miss appointments and not return phone calls, and when the fog starts to lift, you gotta do a whole bloody apology tour.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

By day I am just a regular loser, by night I am the same loser only it’s nighttime.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

Saying “shut up” before skipping the YouTube ad is literally necessary.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Looking for someone who loves me as much as some people love standing up the second a plane lands.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

I love when someone texts “hey,” like I’m supposed to solve the rest.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

I just need a little time to warm up to you, and then I’ll be super fun, I promise—1-2 years at most.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

If you haven’t tried blindfold archery, you should give it a go. You don’t know what you’re missing.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

At this point, Tom Cruise is a stuntman who does his own acting.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,953

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,953

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,427

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Telegram:

If I was on Love Island, I wouldn’t be fighting anyone or starting drama. I would just be playing mermaids in the pool the whole time. They’ve got that giant, beautiful pool, and nobody’s using it.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

You couldn’t pay me to do this year again.

Making waves on Slack:

I bet doom scroll meant something way cooler in the middle ages.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Leggings: elegant for some, elephant for others.

Seen just now on Threads:

There’s really nothing as pathetic as watching a sad little man argue with Grok in hopes of manipulating the conversation to get an answer he wants.

Just shared via Twitch:

Why does tiredness on the couch not follow me to the bed?

Just shared via TikTok:

Ugh, but profoundly.

Trending via Pinterest:

When life gives you lemons, give them back and ask what the crap is all about.

Seen just now on Threads:

If you listen to my husband snore, you don’t need Jurassic Park anymore.

Breaking via YouTube:

Math is like Chinese to me.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,953

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,953

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,428

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

A big F*** YOU to people driving small cars and pulling deep into parking spaces so I think I have a spot until the last second.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

My favorite yoga pose is reaching for the remote control on the far end of the table without falling off the couch.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

Having no one to talk would get you a good sleeping schedule.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

I don’t hate you, but I hope you run out of hot water before you’re finished your shower.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

Technically, all the money I have ever spent on food has been flushed down the toilet.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Just emerged from my Y2K bunker. Everybody okay?

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Annoyed because I want to live my life without a job.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

The cool side of the pillow just stole my boyfriend.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

“Winter is literally the best season.” Okay, husky, go sit outside then.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

“This too shall pass.” And then some other bullshit will come and take its place. It never f**king ends.

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on WhatsApp:

Imagine you blocked me, and I crawled out from under your couch to ask why.

Broadcasted on X:

I’m at the age where the first thing I do when I get somewhere is look for a place to sit.

Just shared via Slack:

I keep my eyes in great shape by rolling them constantly.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Whoops, lost myself for about eight years there.

Just landed via X:

If they’re called leggings, why is your stomach in there?

Spotted on Twitch:

Don’t invite me anywhere in the last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.

Trending via Threads:

People be like “bear with me” and they don’t even have a bear with them.

Just shared via Threads:

Ever since I was little, I always knew I wanted to retire.

Live now on LinkedIn:

That moment your alarm clock goes off in the morning and you don’t know whether to get dressed or fake an illness.

Spotted on TikTok:

Alexa, mute my children.

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