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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

Netflix needs to stop asking if I’m still watching and start asking if I moved the laundry to the dryer yet.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

My New Years resolutions are to do some things, and stop doing some other things.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

‘Tis the season to wrap objects in colorful paper with the fine motor skills of a T-Rex.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

Kids these days don’t know the shame of having to explain yo-yo injuries.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

To all the people who ask singles why they are actually single: Please don’t. We have sworn an oath and are not allowed to tell you the secret of our success.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

Just emerged from my Y2K bunker. Everybody okay?

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

The goth urge to live in a haunted Victorian estate and be feared by the townspeople.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, you’re drunk. Ducks don’t talk.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

Girls Just Want To Have Naan

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Nobody plays better together than siblings being told it’s bedtime.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,961

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,961

Updated

19 seconds ago

Users Online

3,447

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Snapchat:

Descibe your boobs only using a picture of them.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Ever notice how many towns are named after their water tower?

Just shared via WeChat:

I’m not lazy. I just give my couch the love it deserves.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Can anyone recommend some good places for somebody just getting into visiting?

Shared recently on Slack:

It seems that after checking my bank account, I need to turn to a life of crime.

Spotted on Discord:

My biggest fear is waking up and being in the Renaissance era or something. Imagine having the knowledge of hot dogs but lacking the tools to make them.

Breaking via Instagram:

Nowadays, people no longer look for a needle in a haystack, but for errors in a spreadsheet.

Breaking via X:

Lost my Thesaurus. Gutted. Really gutted. Like absolutely gutted.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

If you need time alone, just announce that you need help cleaning the cats litter box.

Going viral on Facebook:

Going to work has backfired on me so many times.

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Funny self-party quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,961

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,961

Updated

19 seconds ago

Users Online

3,442

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

I just sneezed and farted at the same time. I think my body just took a screenshot.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Good morning only to the complexity and uncertainty of everything.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Is there an app yet that converts voice messages into text messages?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

Toddlers: I’ve licked everything so everything is mine now.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

The goth urge to live in a haunted Victorian estate and be feared by the townspeople.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

And for my next trick, I will turn yesterday’s sweatpants into today’s sweatpants.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

I eat posts like yours for breakfast.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

Being abducted by aliens could be just the vacation I need right now.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

If a man says “I don’t deserve you,” believe him. Because he is about to show you why.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Edging my house plants by putting them next to the window when it rains.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Instagram:

Don’t compare yourself with others. Everyone is better than you.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Salsa counts as a serving of vegetables, right?

Just landed via Facebook:

have one of those big paintings with the eyeholes cut out, but I don’t have anyone to spy on, so I just watch TV through it.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Gonna go walk the beach and stare annoyingly at couples. May even growl as I pass by.

Trending via Pinterest:

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again because I have a terrible memory.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Welcome to Twitter, where everyone is an expert on everything.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Behind every robot that turns evil is an engineer who specifically installed red LEDs into the eyes just for this scenario.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I’m forced to conclude that not liking my posts is a you problem.

Reported on WhatsApp:

“Are you seeing someone?” Like a hallucination, therapist, or a guy?

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

When I was a kid I thought shrimp cocktails had alcohol in them and I thought it was such a weird way to get drunk.

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