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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

Trying to spend less time on my phone so I can get back to something I’ve loved since childhood: watching TV.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

Dogs will go through amazing effort to get a better view of your plate.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

Thank God I have a cat. Who else is gonna shit in this box I have?

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

I’ve never really had a beach body, but my snowman body is coming along quite nicely.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Don’t cry because it’s over. Cry because you have an extra hour to think about it.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Never say never. Unless someone asks you when you want to go camping. Then the right answer is always “Never.”

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

God: “I genuinely don’t remember making you all this stupid.”

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

Unfortunately, I will continue to get sexier and funnier.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

You never realize how long a minute is until you’re exercising.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Socialism isn’t wrong because it has compassion. It’s wrong because it doesn’t work.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2414 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,576

Funny Quotes Topics

15,246

Funny Quotes Images

12,576

Updated

43 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Can we get some A.I. to pick plastic out of the ocean, or do all the robots need to be poets?

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Sex is cool but have you ever had your bed all to yourself.

Trending via Threads:

The first guy to clap after seeing something cool must have been like “what the hell am I doing?”

Just landed via WhatsApp:

If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a kid that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

Freshly posted on Threads:

It’s legally required that you lose a frisbee onto the roof within one week of purchase.

Reported on Instagram:

Downloading the Titanic soundtrack. It’s syncing right now.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

I want Wolverine claws. Not for violence or anything. I want them for easing my way through reality. Like opening an Amazon package.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I smoke weed for my mental health and your personal safety.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Yabba dabba doo used to be a rad way to start a Saturday.

Trending via Slack:

At the job interview with one AirPod in.

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Funny social joke quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2414 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,576

Funny Quotes Topics

15,246

Funny Quotes Images

12,576

Updated

43 minutes ago

Users Online

3,457

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

If you want to impress me with your car, it should be an ice cream van.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

The night is dark and full of terrors. My day is long and full of meetings. Same thing.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

Camping: When you spend a small fortune to live like somebody poor.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Don’t be afraid to ask questions during a job interview. It’s the best way to find out if the person you’re interviewing is a good candidate for the job.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Need a permanent vacuum for unwanted thoughts.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Don’t tell me about Stockholm Syndrome, I woke up at 6 AM on my first day of vacation wondering how things were going at work.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Nothing hits harder than opening the fridge for the fifth time, hoping new food magically appeared.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

I’m so thankful I had a childhood before technology took over.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Sorry, I liked your post one second after you posted it but in my defense, I’ve had my phone in my hand since 2012.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

Brave of you to assume you can resist my good looks.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Threatening my husband with tariffs every time he tries to make me watch sports on TV.

Spotted on Reddit:

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I am the human version of tangled headphones.

Seen just now on Discord:

I was going to warn my kids about the repercussions of drugs and alcohol until I realized that they in fact were the repercussions of drugs and alcohol.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

Spotted on Instagram:

If I would’ve known that you were going to ask me what I was thinking, I wouldn’t have been thinking what I was thinking.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Picking up women at the bar and then gently setting them down.

Just landed via WeChat:

Welcome to your fifties. Saturday Night Fever now means lots of rest, cold medicine, and chicken noodle soup.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

My grandfather tried to warn them about the Titanic. He screamed and shouted about the iceberg and how the ship was going to sink, but all they did was throw him out of the theater.

Trending via Pinterest:

A guy who never leaves his apartment so he can get the maximum value out of his rent.

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