Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

This place was really tidy yesterday. It’s a shame you missed it.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

Why do people always assume it’s a compliment when I tell them their baby looks just like them?

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

I don’t hate you, I just don’t want to see you alive.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

I don’t usually think about what I say before I say it. I prefer to think about it after I’ve said it, late at night, for the rest of my life.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

My retirement plan is time travel to the 80s.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

The only way I’m gonna hit the gym is if I accidentally drive into it.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

The person opposite me has a donut. I do not have a donut. That should be my donut. This person is now my arch nemesis.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

“So, what are your hobbies?” Oh, I can’t afford any.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

All my small talk is done with a car horn.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

Be the reason someone burns sage.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,380

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Facebook:

“You’re always sleeping,” God forbid a woman wants to be unconscious.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Note to self: just because it’s in the map app’s directions, doesn’t mean the road is paved.

Shared recently on Reddit:

In retrospect, I guess “one drunken night of stupidity” isn’t the best response when a child asks you where babies come from.

Shared recently on WeChat:

“You’re a cougar!” God forbid a woman gives back to the youth.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

So I got a call from a telemarketer, and he said he couldn’t understand me. I told him, “Press 1 for English.”

Going viral on Facebook:

On a dare, my son sprayed deodorant in his mouth. Now he speaks with an Axe scent.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Men will ruin your whole life then come back and like your story.

Trending via Instagram:

You don’t need fun to have alcohol.

Seen just now on Slack:

Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

Going viral on Reddit:

At the self-checkout, I make small talk with myself and I wish I would just shut up.

Funny steering quotes

Funny steering quotes 🚗😂 are the perfect way to add some humor to your daily drive! Whether you’re stuck in traffic or cruising down the highway, these witty gems keep the mood light and the smiles wide 😄✨. Ready to steer your day in a hilarious direction? Buckle up and enjoy the ride filled with laughter and clever twists! 🚦🤣

New funny steering quotes 👇

All funny steering quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

20 shares on TikTok this month:

GTA6 should have streams and wetlands so we can work to conserve and restore them.

12 shares on WeChat this month:

I think we just need to accept that the 90’s was our peak as a species.

85 shares on TikTok this month:

A recent study showed that people who are reading this text thought they were learning something useful.

64 shares on Facebook this month:

Dear sleep: thanks for trying, but you can’t beat surfing the net.

55 shares on Discord this month:

My wife bought new towels and they’re different colors, so I know the entire color scheme of my house is about to change.

54 shares on Twitch this month:

90% of debugging is just realizing your own stupidity in slow motion.

10 shares on Facebook this month:

Way too many low IQ conspiracy theories floating around. Give me high IQ conspiracy theories.

100 shares on TikTok this month:

The Jaws theme stays on during sex.

37 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Just because your parents planned you doesn’t mean you weren’t a mistake.

93 shares on WeChat this month:

Apparently, if you leave your Tupperware cupboard unorganized for too long, they procreate, and extra lids appear out of nowhere.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

In my defense, Your Honor, I was left unsupervised.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t invite me anywhere in the last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

If I was a star and you were a star, I would wink at you and blink at you and twinkle at you and the earthlings would call it science.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I think my new neighbors are creeps. They seem to be looking into my window every time I’m looking out my window to see what they are doing.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Instead of likes, we should get a little kiss.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Just drank a big glass of water, and I regret to inform you, they might be right about hydration.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

What we need is an evil Santa who steals our children’s most annoying toys.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve mastered farting, and it be loud and quick, but the key is don’t make a face or look around, so people can’t pinpoint it to you. Just act natural.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Shoulda named my daughter Calculus cause damn she’s complicated.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Are people born with photographic memories or do they take time to develop?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,530

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Welcome to your 40s, your level of cleaning is directly related to whether your guest can see without readers.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Death cannot harm me more than you have harmed me, my beloved life.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

How come it’s called “thrift store shopping” instead of Goodwill hunting?

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

I find it extremely hard to believe that you’re rolling on the floor laughing.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

I know it’s traditional to start work at 9, but I think we could lower that age to 8.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

I would like to unsubscribe from all responsibilities, please and thank you.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

I hope the coffee hits harder than reality does.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Not arguing with a man that can cook. Whatever you say, handsome.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

I hope you can hear me thinking about you.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

Taylor Swift should write a song about when your sleeves keep rolling down every time you wash the dishes.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Messenger:

If we were subway rats, I’d share my pizza crust with you.

Just landed via X:

I hate to brag, but I’ve been the biggest mistake of numerous people’s lives.

Trending via Discord:

If you’re reading this, drink some water. You’re not a cactus.

Just landed via Instagram:

Be the reason someone burns sage.

Trending via Pinterest:

You can talk about any topic for 30 mins if you’re a confident liar.

Breaking via Discord:

Can’t argue with a guy that has curly hair. Whatever you say, gorgeous.

Making waves on Slack:

Just cleaned out my junk drawer if anyone needs a CD to reinstall Windows 95.

Making waves on X:

Losing weight in your 40’s: LOL!

Making waves on LinkedIn:

“Because my hair is not done” is a very valid reason to decline an outing.

Just shared via WeChat:

My trauma is between me and this bartender. The rest of you, mind your business.

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