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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

“I’m tired of being forced to eat microplastics. I’m ready for big plastics now.”

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

If it hurts you more than it hurts them, you are holding the taser wrong.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

“She’s so self-centered”—who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

I was dismayed to hear the story of Rumpelstiltskin. I had no idea he was like that outside of work.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

“Jump to Recipe” is the closest we’ll ever get to teleportation.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

The most avoidant man you know is somewhere telling someone he’s a lover boy.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

The rule should be: if you can smell the cookout, you’re invited to the cookout.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

When there’s food around, our cat is like an adorable, fluffy shark circling round.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Every time my neighbors start moaning, I pause my music to rate the performance.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,388

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on TikTok:

I don’t hide from my problems, I just ignore them until they lose interest.

Spotted on Instagram:

If you’ve been talking for 5 minutes straight, it might be someone else’s turn.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

There should be a variant of fencing with two guys trying to kiss one another.

Spotted on WeChat:

Why is experimental noise music always scary metallic noises and never fun sounds like people clapping and laughing and like bubbles and stuff?

Seen just now on X:

I appreciate the sun for always moving in the sky in a predictable way but I also respect the moon for just kind of doing whatever.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Body: time to fall asleep. Brain: hey, that’s an interesting thought, here’s six billion more.

Shared recently on X:

My morning routine includes 20 minutes of staring at the ceiling thinking about how tired I am and debating if I really need to live today.

Trending via WhatsApp:

So, Earth is basically auditions for heaven and hell.

Broadcasted on Discord:

As a proud husband and father in my 40s, my New Year’s resolution is to sneeze even louder this year.

Spotted on Telegram:

If he doesn’t like your fruit puns, you need to let that mango.

Funny trumpet quotes

Funny trumpet quotes blow the lid off serious music vibes 🎺😂 Whether you’re a brass newbie or a seasoned pro, these witty sayings hit all the right notes 🎶😆 Get ready to laugh, relate, and maybe even toot your own horn a little louder! 🎉🎷 #TrumpetLife #BrassBanters

New funny trumpet quotes 👇

All funny trumpet quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

83 shares on Snapchat this month:

In my 20’s: I want to find true love. In my 40’s: I just want a toaster that gets me.

70 shares on LinkedIn this month:

What a lot of people don’t understand about mountain climbing is that don’t do that.

98 shares on Discord this month:

Sugar held my hand through every breakup.

67 shares on Messenger this month:

I need a browser plugin that disables Amazon when I’m drinking. Hashtag: don’t drink and Prime.

97 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m officially at the age where going out on the weekend just means I’m running errands.

16 shares on Instagram this month:

All positions for annoying people in my life have been filled. Applicants need not apply, thank you.

43 shares on Threads this month:

A burrito is just a sleeping bag for beans.

29 shares on WeChat this month:

Just because the deodorant says 48 hours, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

21 shares on Threads this month:

I’ve been so stressed about getting my shit together that I haven’t gotten any of my shit together.

79 shares on Facebook this month:

Your honor, I was under the impression it was hammer time.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a good heart has done nothing but made me look stupid.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

You never realize what you have until it’s gone. Toilet paper is a good example.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope this email punches you square in the face.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Who called it a Cybertruck and not a Deplorean?

17 folks are currently checking 👀

You don’t scare me. You’re not the evil eye I get from my dog when I make him get up from the couch so I can lay down.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

All the world’s a stage, and I always forget my line.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

People on Facebook be like “can anyone tell me about a thing I can easily Google myself?”

12 folks are currently checking 👀

“You never reply to messages.” I am just one person, okay? I am understaffed.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body is that I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Roadtripping with my family has taught me that my marriage can withstand anything except roadtripping with my family.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,506

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

Just once I’d like to hear a doctor say, “Your guess is as good as mine.”

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

Sometimes the universe puts you in the same situations again to see if you’re still an idiot.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

I’m so single. When they ask me for an emergency contact, I put the neighbor’s dog.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

At the grocery store, but forgot my wife’s list so I guess I’ll just follow this other guy around and get what he gets.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

I bought a 12 year old whiskey. His parents are furious.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Today is the Mondayest Thursday that has ever been mistaken for a Friday in the history of Wednesdays.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

I take offense when people don’t invite me to events l’d like to turn down.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

I’ve been on Facebook for so long, I remember when it all used to be farmland.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

I will unfriend, uncousin, unco-worker, unfollow, unfamily any draining soul real quick.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

Why learn new slang? Stay bogus.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Snapchat:

I bet the kids in Mrs. Doubtfire were surprised when found out their nanny was famous actor Robin Williams the whole time.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Money talks, but all mine ever says is goodbye.

Going viral on Telegram:

Spiders are the only web developers who love finding bugs.

Just landed via Discord:

I was going to learn to play the violin, but it was too much of a commitment. I wanted something with no strings attached.

Just shared via Messenger:

Sex is cool, but have you ever had a can opener that actually works?

Trending via Slack:

For your own sanity, move on like you never knew them, because in reality, you never did.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

A Tinder type app, but it matches you with sandwiches.

Breaking via Pinterest:

When a man likes you, he talks to you every day, and apparently, when you start to like him back, he is very busy and can’t talk at all. That’s how it works.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Attention to detail is so sexy, study me, baby.

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