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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

I miss the way I viewed the world before I found out too much about it.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Seaweed is great for when you want to eat pure salt but wish it had the texture of slime.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

Just call me Mother Nature because I can go from hot to cold in a 24-hour period, too.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

The internet is making people stupid. Not me, though.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

“You have reached your monthly article limit,” – a website you’ve never accessed before today.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

I wanted to sleep it off, but insomnia said, “Not tonight, buddy.”

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

A narcissist wants the authority of a king while having the accountability of a toddler.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

Being a woman is trying to guess what the hell is going on with your body three times a week.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

If they treat you like an option, leave them like a choice, and make your exit as dramatic as a Netflix season finale.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

Person in murder documentary: This is a small town. Things like this don’t happen here. Me: Um, based on the shows I watch, that’s all that happens in small towns.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,556

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

I wouldn’t describe myself as an “adult”, per se. More like a “long child”.

Making waves on Messenger:

I’m not good at solving Pi, but I’m really good at eating it.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I was walking near a construction site today and heard the foreman yell, “You’re doing a good job!” I know that was meant for me.

Spotted on Instagram:

Will mosquitoes ever develop a pizza obsession and end their pursuit of human blood?

Making waves on Snapchat:

December. The month at work where everything is January’s problem.

Just shared via Threads:

Work meetings would be a lot more fun if they took place in a giant IKEA ball pit.

Going bananas on Twitch:

I used to judge cat owners for giving in to their pets’ whims too easily, but holy shit, these animals are relentless and would starve themselves to organ failure just because one time, weeks ago, they had a taste of some ‘better’ food.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Airbnb should have an option if you just want to use someone’s bathroom for a few minutes.

Going viral on Discord:

Y’all can keep the nonchalant ones — I want mine weak in the knees about me.

Shared recently on Slack:

That awkward moment when someone you hate is breathing.

Funny unexpected meeting quotes

New funny unexpected meeting quotes 👇

You don’t even have to date, by the way. You can just take a break from love and then randomly meet the actual love of your life somewhere you weren’t even supposed to be.

2 days ago

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All funny unexpected meeting quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

76 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Films and television have led me to believe that masquerade balls have a higher mortality rate than most wars.

27 shares on Messenger this month:

I need a long hot meteor shower.

49 shares on Pinterest this month:

Showing up late with an iced coffee is not about poor time management, it’s about knowing how to make an entrance.

34 shares on Threads this month:

Misses Claus only married Santa because of his big sack.

36 shares on Snapchat this month:

I now have Taylor Swift as my alarm. Now I always wake up five minutes earlier so I don’t have to listen to it.

58 shares on WeChat this month:

Having a good heart has done nothing but made me look stupid.

79 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Fries, not lies.

39 shares on Pinterest this month:

There’s nothing more satisfying than the little nap you have after hitting snooze on your alarm.

14 shares on Messenger this month:

Not really interested in anything that isn’t everything.

26 shares on Reddit this month:

All I’m saying is that big burgers should be wider not taller.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Stretching isn’t enough. I need to be able to disassemble my body like Legos.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Summer is the time when it’s too hot to do what it was too cold to do in winter.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

All I’m saying is that I’m closer to being a millionaire than Jeff Bezos is.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

My life coach told me I didn’t make the team.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

I feel like whoever named them rice cakes has never actually eaten a cake.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Welcome to middle age: your chin looks lonely; here’s another one.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

Follow your dreams – ideally in a field that will still require humans when you graduate.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

Being single allows you to do a lot of things. For example, standing naked in the kitchen at night and eating cold pizza.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

Looks fade but dark, twisted, inappropriate humor is forever.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Waiting for the websites to start offering pizza instead of just cookies.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via LinkedIn:

I stay up late every night, regret it in the morning, and the next day I do it all over again.

Just shared via WeChat:

Never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright.

Making waves on Messenger:

You’re so cultured I’mma start calling you Yogurt.

Seen just now on Threads:

Dear Snapchat memory, that’s not my friend anymore.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

So many true crime podcasts are just like “a young woman went missing, the police took a week to respond, she was last seen with a man the community call Creepy Steve, he has never been questioned”

Just shared via Facebook:

Good morning to life’s chaos, where my coffee is the only thing that makes sense!

Just shared via YouTube:

I think my soulmate might be carbs.

Seen just now on YouTube:

The Bible is 100% accurate when thrown at close range.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Does my career know that I’m pursuing it, or is it another one-sided relationship?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny unexpected meeting quotes

New funny unexpected meeting quotes 👇

You don’t even have to date, by the way. You can just take a break from love and then randomly meet the actual love of your life somewhere you weren’t even supposed to be.

All funny unexpected meeting quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨