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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

“You win some. You lose some.” Me, after losing for the millionth time in a row.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

I will marry a man who treats me delicately as if I’m a gift straight from heaven.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

Tried Adderall to help my productivity but now I’m just intensely aware of all the things I should be doing.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

I can’t believe I was arrested for impersonating a politician. I was just sitting there doing nothing.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

I once made the irresponsible decision to drink and drive and now I have to live the rest of my days with a coffee stain on my favorite sweater.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

Getting mad at your hair is a whole different kind of angry.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

If you want to impress me with your car, it should be an ice cream van.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

It’s healthy to be a little insane sometimes.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

You misunderstood me. I said I was a “bawler,” not a “baller.” You know, someone who cries a lot.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Micro-dosing time travel by going to bed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

770 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,932

Funny Quotes Topics

13,903

Funny Quotes Images

10,932

Updated

37 minutes ago

Users Online

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

When God created the giraffe, he probably slipped with the mouse on the screen. This is how its neck was created.

Seen just now on Reddit:

It’s a beautiful morning. Lots of people out walking their phones.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I drink all this water and for what. Just to pee? This planet is a prison.

Seen just now on Threads:

My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

Trending via Reddit:

What makes us human is selecting all images with traffic lights.

Just shared via Twitch:

Bored as hell. Anyone want to emotionally manipulate each other?

Just shared via Facebook:

That depressing moment when you start your car to go to work and it doesn’t explode.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Are you coming to the party? There will be noise and lights but I found a corner for us to hide.

Going viral on Instagram:

When your kid asks you where the other parent is, they’re really saying that they’d like to speak with the manager.

Going viral on Reddit:

I love making the whole conversation so awkward that the most anyone can say after is “so yeah…”

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Funny wet nap quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

770 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,932

Funny Quotes Topics

13,903

Funny Quotes Images

10,932

Updated

37 minutes ago

Users Online

3,421

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. It can’t just be the one guy. It’s gotta be a group of people pooping my son’s diaper.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

There are advantages to living alone: everything always stays where you put it. There are disadvantages to living alone: everything always stays where you put it.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

People who don’t talk to themselves are the weird ones.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Me driving at night: I hope this is the road!

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

In honor of Charles Dickens, I will also be poor this Christmas.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

If you catch me smiling at you, chances are I am plotting my revenge.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Please don’t send me mixed signals, I don’t even understand the clear ones.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

I’m a pocket full of sunshine, not your dumping ground for grumpiness.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

Remembering my youth, and a time where I could breath out of more than one nostril at once.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

I’m not alone. I have ants.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Messenger:

I’m begging for a day to be added in between Saturday and Sunday.

Trending via Pinterest:

Just saw my evil doppelganger speed away in a DeLorean. I’m sure it’s fine.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Whoever named the grapefruit when there was already a fruit named grape. Incompetent legend. I wish we could hang out.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Money can’t buy happiness, until you’re on vacation and then you realize it definitely can.

Live now on Threads:

If you think you’re going to be in a dangerous situation, dress accordingly. Don’t wear flip-flops to a bank robbery, for example.

Going viral on YouTube:

Some hoodies don’t hoodie the way other hoodies hoodie.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Just a reminder that you’re not allowed to hit your coworkers. Even if they’re stupid. I asked. Twice.

Making waves on Telegram:

Any place is a walkable city if you’re broke enough.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Tonight I wanted to stop drinking but then I remembered the owner of the pub has a family to feed.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Ten million people accused me of exaggerating today.

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