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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

Beware. There are people in the grocery store that you know who want to chat with you. Stay vigilant.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Shopping is the only exercise I need.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

There is no physiological reason to yell when you sneeze. People who do that are simply weak and rude.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

It seems a little unfair that the people who want to go to bed have to put the people to bed who don’t want to go to bed.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

My whole life just flashed before my eyes and there was way too much pizza.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

I forgot to turn my clocks back and, oh my God, you guys are not going to believe the stuff that happens in the next hour.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

I don’t like people driving fast—that’s the reason why I overtake them.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

There’s nothing worse than accidentally becoming an important person at your job.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

Why learn new slang? Stay bogus.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

People are too judgmental these days… I can tell just by looking at them.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,501

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

My hobbies include going home, wishing I was at home, and being at home.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

If I met someone like me, I’d be really concerned for them.

Going viral on Reddit:

Pretty sure the inventor of noise-canceling headphones had a young kid trying to learn an instrument.

Just landed via YouTube:

My patience is like a gift card, not sure how much is left but lets give it a try.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Remember when a series of unfortunate events was a book and not your life?

Live now on Discord:

I’m really glad that light only attracts insects. Imagine wild boars would come knocking at your windows all the time.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I like when the superheroes that can fly pick up and carry the ones that can’t.

Just landed via Twitch:

I’ve disappointed better people.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Every group chat has that one person who never replies, and it’s me.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I just think we should kiss. And kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss. But that’s just me.

I hate that Al has now caused me to question the authenticity of cute animal videos online. I don’t even know if this baby penguin actually wore a beret to go buy a tiny baguette in Paris.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When even penguins are trendier than me with their tiny baguettes, I start questioning my life choices 🐧🥖😆

actually, AI, al, animal, authenticity, baby, baby penguin, baguette, beret, buy, cute, cute animal video, even, hate, humor, i, know, me, online, Paris, penguin, question, skepticism, tiny, video, videos

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

“I asked ChatGPT,” “I asked Grok.” Well, I just made some shit up, and people believe me because I’m well read and use big words.

0

2 months ago

AI, asked, believe, big, ChatGPT, confidence, credibility, deception, grok, humor, i, intelligence, just, language, me, people, read, shit, storytelling, well, wit, words
Never forget that your fave celebs were trying to sell you cartoon monkey pictures during a pandemic.

0

2 months ago

absurdity, art, cartoon, celebrity, celebrity culture, celebs, culture, forget, humor, media, monkey, pandemic, pictures, sell, social, social media, trying
Some days you feel like a hotel light. You’re there, but you don’t have enough energy to really do anything.

0

2 months ago

day, days, do nothing, energy, exhaustion, feel, feeling, feeling low, hotel, hotel light, humor, lazy, lazy day, light, low, nothing, relatable
What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at social gatherings.

0

2 months ago

awkwardness, gathering, gatherings, humor, interaction, kill, personality, resilience, social, social awkwardness, social gathering, social interaction, weird
Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

0

2 months ago

advice, creativity, financial, financial advice, humor, imagination, lifestyle, means, wit
“I’m so grateful that so many things are none of my business.”

0

2 months ago

business, grateful, gratitude, humor, none, privacy, sarcasm, things

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

77 shares on Snapchat this month:

Getting money from the Tooth Fairy is a gateway drug to organ trafficking.

12 shares on Discord this month:

Boys say that girls are dramatic, but have you ever plucked a man’s eyebrow? They act like they’ve been shot.

31 shares on Threads this month:

If you love a friend, let them go. If they come back with coffee, it was meant to be.

29 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I trust an insult more than I do a compliment.

72 shares on Reddit this month:

My dream car is a taco truck.

36 shares on Pinterest this month:

Don’t blame the alcohol. You were an idiot before you started drinking.

54 shares on Reddit this month:

America’s national anthem should be changed to Welcome to the Jungle.

92 shares on Discord this month:

I’m intermittent fasting, so I have to finish this cake really quick before 6 pm.

79 shares on Snapchat this month:

If my house is clean, just know I yelled at everyone for two hours first.

11 shares on YouTube this month:

I don’t have gray hair, I have wisdom highlights.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

The true horror genre: my old Facebook statuses.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

If I win the lottery, I’m buying four politicians and some really nice shoes.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

Just seen a guy with a Coca-Cola and yellow Lay’s chips. Classic combo, he knows his stuff.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

Oh, lord. I brought my mouth with me to work today and it’s all sass. Prayers, please.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I wonder what happened to the people who asked me for directions.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

At my age I don’t sleep, I nap between pee breaks.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

Shall I cook, clean, or do the grocery shopping? Okay, reading it is.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

If you have a Roomba, but don’t dress it up in little outfits, then what are you even doing?

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

A fun thing to do at work is call in sick and stay home.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

Headed to a wedding but my wife said I’m not allowed to refer to the bride as ‘the veiled threat.’

Seen just now on Messenger:

Not to brag but I don’t even need meditation, my mind goes blank the second someone asks me for directions.

Making waves on WeChat:

It’s scary when an attractive person is attracted to you, omg.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.

Just landed via Instagram:

Turns out strange women lying in ponds distributing swords was a better basis for a system of government actually.

Just shared via Threads:

The main reason for stress is the daily contact with idiots.

Spotted on YouTube:

Dear recipe websites. I don’t need your life story. Just give me the recipe.

Going viral on Slack:

I love when people say “be yourself,” like I haven’t already been doing that and scaring everyone off.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I’m stuck between “I need to save money” and “You only live once.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I hate that Al has now caused me to question the authenticity of cute animal videos online. I don’t even know if this baby penguin actually wore a beret to go buy a tiny baguette in Paris.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

“I asked ChatGPT,” “I asked Grok.” Well, I just made some shit up, and people believe me because I’m well read and use big words.

Never forget that your fave celebs were trying to sell you cartoon monkey pictures during a pandemic.

Some days you feel like a hotel light. You’re there, but you don’t have enough energy to really do anything.

What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at social gatherings.

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

“I’m so grateful that so many things are none of my business.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨