Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

Unless you fell off the treadmill, no one wants to hear about your workout.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Life would be so much easier if the nose of people who lie all the time did actually grow longer like Pinocchio’s.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

I just ordered a life alert bracelet, so if I ever get a life, I will be notified immediately.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

I probably think this song is about me.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 40s. Your bra wins the Oscar for the best actor in a supportive role.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

According to my calculations, we’re all screwed.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Therapy isn’t about being “fixed.” It’s about being your therapist’s favorite patient.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

May her tire get flat with a dude who can’t change it.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

My favorite part of Spring is its rolls.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

The only thing I gained so far this year is weight.