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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Children really brighten up a home. They never turn the lights off, …

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Am simultaneously the family’s black sheep and gold star, and that’s exactly why I’m the way I am.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

I saw The Blair Witch Project way too young and it made me afraid of projects.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

Sex is cool but have you ever had a king size bed all to yourself.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Hope this email finds you moonwalking out of work early.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

My life is constantly oscillating between “must save money” and “you only live once”.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

I only go on LinkedIn to see what my coworkers looked like 15 years ago.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

My toxic trait is treating my glasses like they’re not the most expensive thing I wear everyday.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Why have abs when you can have kebabs?

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Sticking googly eyes on a potato and introducing him to everyone as my new boyfriend.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,848

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on TikTok:

English is so fake. How can you drink a drink, but you can’t food a food?

Broadcasted on Threads:

If you don’t have anything nice to say, sign up for Twitter.

Going viral on Instagram:

Got thrown out of the grocery store for holding a rotisserie chicken up like Simba again.

Trending via TikTok:

My brain has too many tabs open and one of them is playing music I can’t find.

Making waves on Discord:

I saw someone wearing a shirt today that said “Eat Pasta Run Fasta,” and I can’t get it out of my head.

Making waves on WeChat:

Eventually, kids get old enough to see which parent was the problem.

Just shared via Instagram:

The cost of living has gotten so high, I’m thinking about having a nap for dinner.

Going bananas on Discord:

I set up a Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Went for a run this morning. That bee was huge!

Making waves on Discord:

Your secret is safe with me because I don’t care.

Me (young, naive): “I hope something good happens.” Me (now): “I hope whatever bad happens is at least funny.”

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Me (young, naive): “I hope something good happens.” Me (now): “I hope whatever bad happens is at least funny.”
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Commentary:
"Lol, I'm officially fluent in Sarcasm Level 99! 🎓🤦‍♂️😂"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

43 shares on Slack this month:

I love being a pretty woman because it widens the threshold for cringe-worthy things I can say.

75 shares on Threads this month:

You better be kissing the screen when I send pics.

67 shares on TikTok this month:

By the time someone says, ‘To make a long story short,’ it’s too late.

12 shares on Telegram this month:

Life is just a series of Sopranos references with some other things mixed in.

82 shares on Snapchat this month:

You’re so cultured I’mma start calling you Yogurt.

31 shares on YouTube this month:

All day I think about sleep but when it’s time to go to bed I don’t wanna.

89 shares on Facebook this month:

Fundamentally, I understand chess, because I too would never let my king feel unsafe.

22 shares on Pinterest this month:

Stop blaming everyone for your problems. Pick one person you really hate and blame them for everything.

57 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m not like other teenagers, I’m 51.

54 shares on YouTube this month:

I changed my Facebook name to “Benefits.” Now, when people add me, it says, “You are now friends with benefits.”

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

My dad wasn’t absent or present; he was a secret third thing.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Slapping the TV remote on your knee extends the battery life. It’s science.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I am one step away from being rich, all I need now is money.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve disappointed better people.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

This is my phone. I text back when I want to.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

If you ever need me, I’m always just a couple missed calls and text messages away.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Thunder is fake. It doesn’t even sync up properly with lightning. There’s some guy who waits till he sees lightning and then he presses the thunder button.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Shout out to Yamaha for being like, “Here’s a cool motorcycle. Also, here’s a cool piano.”

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m sorry you had a bad experience at our restaurant. To make it up to you, here is a coupon for more of our terrible, terrible food.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

What a bleak life it must be if you’ve never had a drink shoot through your nose when you laugh.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,727

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇩 has copied:

Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

People will love you. People will hate you. And none of it will have anything to do with you.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

My age is news to me every single time I remember.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Let’s all stand up against iron deficiency (but not too fast).

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

Pretending you don’t notice people staring at you is a skill.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

That fight could’ve been an email.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

I start each day assuming it will be horrible and go from there.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

You don’t need to explain yourself if you carry a chainsaw.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

I always like to remember the time before the internet. It was so good not to know how cruel and stupid humanity really is.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Gravity called. It’s sick of holding me up.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

With age comes wisdom. And digestive trouble.

Seen just now on YouTube:

So sad. Elvis died before he could see the Lego movie. He woulda been like, ‘Mama, those blocks are movin’ and shakin.’

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Coworkers are funny. You could see a guy every day for 5 years then he quits and you never see or even think about him again.

Spotted on Telegram:

If you have an old house, but you haven’t got a ghost, you should complain to the estate agent.

Making waves on Facebook:

Do people who do triathlons know that they don’t have to?

Trending via TikTok:

There’s no way you could go all the way through the desert on a horse with no name, you’d have named it by the end.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Aliens, robots, mutant ladybugs — whoever takes over will be better than this.

Freshly posted on Discord:

It’s not fair when attractive people are also good at things.

Going bananas on Telegram:

The most incredible thing about James Bond is the way he can walk into any hotel room and immediately know how to use the shower.

Going viral on X:

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

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