Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

Need to clean the fridge, so I’m going to do the responsible thing and drink wine instead.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

When I’m at a party, I pretend to be Pac-Man. I eat everything and run away from anyone coming close to me.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

My love language is being sent money.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Welcome to your 40s. Your bra wins the Oscar for the best actor in a supportive role.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

Sometimes you really do write a whole poem just to give one beautiful phrase a home.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

There has been a British voice in my head saying, “Bit sad innit,” for the past few weeks.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

Of course the laundry has to be done, but the wine doesn’t drink itself either.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

I’m only grumpy when I’m awake.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Just gonna drink light beers today, because I don’t wanna get drunk but I do enjoy peeing 30 times.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

Going to a concert with a tomato in each hand just to make the band nervous.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,596

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Twitch:

There are two quantities of popcorn: not enough and what have I done

Spotted on YouTube:

Social media is a great way to make new enemies.

Just shared via Messenger:

No, I’m not depressed. I’m sure there’s just something wrong with the planets or stars or something.

Going viral on TikTok:

The worst thing you can do when cleaning your house is “sit down for a minute.”

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Spotify Wrapped? Next year, maybe you should try to be in the top .05% of listeners to your girlfriend.

Shared recently on X:

If overthinking burned calories, I’d never need to exercise again.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Are we all getting a front-row seat to the end times, or what?

Broadcasted on Twitch:

This Monday is Mondaying like it’s never Mondayed before.

Making waves on Threads:

“I asked Grok.” “I asked ChatGPT.” Well, I asked R2D2, and he said you’re a loser.

Trending via TikTok:

I’m at the age where I see a huge, beautiful mansion in a movie and think, “How much does it cost to heat that house in the winter?”

No place in this world is as dark as my archived chats on WhatsApp.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs haunted houses when you have your archived chats on WhatsApp lurking in the shadows? 🌚👻 #SpookyConversations"

archived, archived chat, chat, communication, conversation, dark, dark humor, digital, digital life, humor, life, media, online, online communication, place, social, social media, texting, WhatsApp, world

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Don’t hate me because I can fall asleep within seconds; hate me because I can sleep through the night without having to get up to go to the bathroom.

0

2 months ago

asleep, bathroom, fall, fall asleep, hate, having, humor, i, jealousy, me, night, rest, seconds, sleep
The concept of a courtroom sketch artist is so funny to me. Here’s our little murder doodler.

0

2 months ago

art, artist, concept, courtroom, courtroom drama, doodler, drama, humor, little, me, murder, sketch, sketch artist
I don’t know much about women, but they love containers that hold smaller containers.

0

5 months ago

container, containers, gift, hold, humor, i, joke, know, love, much, relationship, smaller, women
I see why history can repeat itself. People are really stupid.

0

2 months ago

history, human, human nature, humor, i, irony, nature, people, repeat, repetition, stupid, stupidity, why
Some people you look at or hear talking and think to yourself, the wheel may be turning, but the hamster is dead.

0

2 months ago

alive, dead, hamster, hear, humor, observation, people, talking, think, thinking, turning, wheel, yourself
Not right now. I’m manifesting.

0

5 months ago

excuse, humor, manifesting, mindfulness, motivation, procrastination, right, self-care

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

78 shares on X this month:

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

89 shares on YouTube this month:

Nothing I do for money is passion-based. It’s just pure hatred for being broke.

98 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Roses are red. Pizza sauce is too. I ordered a large. And none of it’s for you.

61 shares on YouTube this month:

Waiting for toast to toast takes forever unless you walk away for 10 seconds, then it burns.

35 shares on YouTube this month:

I was in a good mood until I realized not only was it not Friday it wasn’t even Thursday.

85 shares on X this month:

If it’s a ghost ship, why does it have to be on water?

27 shares on Telegram this month:

Forgot my glasses, so I’m pointing at a random spot on the menu and hoping for the best.

77 shares on Facebook this month:

Females be cheating in healthy relationships, but are faithful in toxic ones.

85 shares on Twitch this month:

My mom asked me where I’m taking her to eat on Mother’s Day. I told her we have food at home.

79 shares on Threads this month:

How am I supposed to relax when there are things?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

My husband sure has a lot of opinions on which movie he’s gonna sleep through.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

If you add orange juice to Jason Momoa, you get a Jason Mimosa.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

You hit a couple of curbs, take out a trash can and all of a sudden it’s “you can’t drive”.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

I’m looking forward to tomorrow. It’ll be much like today, but different enough to confuse me.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

I want whatever the people who run at 6 a.m. have.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

I thought Game of Thrones was a pooping contest for men.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

At Christmas time, all outstanding invoices are always transferred with the reference “Hohoho”.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Spongebob never let anyone dull his whimsical spirit.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

Since I stopped texting first, I haven’t heard from a lot of people in a while.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror movie. After a while it won’t feel like you are alone anymore.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Pinterest:

The most expensive clothing you’ll ever wear is a hospital gown.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I’m confused how a cemetery can raise its funeral prices and blame it on the cost of living.

Freshly posted on X:

Of course babies cry when flying, their entire understanding of planes centers around them being eaten.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I delete posts cause I be getting mature over the hours.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Aging gracefully is like getting steamrolled gracefully, you should really be screaming.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Your favorite little ball of silliness has logged in.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

If I were Noah, I’d bring three of every animal just to create some drama.

Trending via Instagram:

Have you ever met the human version of a headache?

Spotted on Discord:

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

Seen just now on Reddit:

At least 80% of my day is spent holding back my inappropriate thoughts.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

No place in this world is as dark as my archived chats on WhatsApp.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Don’t hate me because I can fall asleep within seconds; hate me because I can sleep through the night without having to get up to go to the bathroom.

The concept of a courtroom sketch artist is so funny to me. Here’s our little murder doodler.

I don’t know much about women, but they love containers that hold smaller containers.

I see why history can repeat itself. People are really stupid.

Some people you look at or hear talking and think to yourself, the wheel may be turning, but the hamster is dead.

Not right now. I’m manifesting.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨