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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

Everyone is celebrating my vegan Bolognese sauce. The secret ingredient is minced meat.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Therapy isn’t enough. I need a new identity and a passport.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

Regrettably, my children appear to have befriended a child I find annoying.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

The best time to visit Japan is when you have money!

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

How can I be ready for the future when I’m not even ready to get up in the morning?

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

The horror: “Come on, I’ll introduce you to everyone.”

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

Having a toddler is wild. I’m getting breaking news about Peppa Pig.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,912

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

Social anxiety so bad I wonder if I’m welcome at places I was invited to.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

The female rage of having so much to say but refusing to say it, cause their emotional intelligence is too low for them to comprehend it.

Going viral on Facebook:

Please don’t use fear to manipulate me. Much more effective to use cake.

Making waves on Discord:

When someone touches my phone, I automatically turn into a ninja.

Freshly posted on Threads:

No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

Trending via Telegram:

Time Magazine should have a Worst Person of the Year!

Freshly posted on Threads:

Imagine hating me and i’m just over here doing a much better job at hating myself than any of y’all could do.

People always say, “There’s plenty of fish in the sea” … yeah, but I’ve got my eye fixed on that specific, emotionally distant salmon who has commitment issues.

People always say, “There’s plenty of fish in the sea” … yeah, but I’ve got my eye fixed on that specific, emotionally distant salmon who has commitment issues.
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Commentary:
I've got a hook, line, and sinker for that elusive salmon, but they keep ghosting me for the deep blue! 🎣🐟😂

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,969

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

Currently accepting DMs from any man with a sturdy bunker on his property.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

This year for Thanksgiving, I’ll probably bring what I brought last year… shame upon the family.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

The trash gets picked up tomorrow. Be ready.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

This is a horrible time in history to be a decent human being.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Why talk to bots when my plants listen just fine?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

As long as I’m alive, I can begin again and again and again, again and again and again, again and again and again.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

You are the wind beneath my overly sensitive, motion-activated floodlight.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I wish other jobs let us solve issues by releasing diss tracks. Got some sick rhymes about Debbie from accounting and her poorly structured invoicing.

Making waves on Telegram:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a cardiac surgeon in the middle of heart surgery.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

The next man who speaks to me will be sacrificed to the gods for a bountiful harvest.

Making waves on Facebook:

Good morning, may your coffee be strong and your boss not weird today.

Live now on Snapchat:

Toddlers: the brutally honest roommates nobody asked for!

Just shared via Reddit:

Don’t ever get excited if your kid likes a new food. They won’t like it tomorrow.

Just shared via Discord:

Men with bibles names be the worst type of people.

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