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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

“Angry on the internet” is such an unfortunate personality.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

“What’s wrong with you?” Right now or in general?

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

Maybe if we sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Ladies, if you receive flowers with no card on them today, they’re from me.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

No one warned me that being an adult was mostly just hurrying up to get somewhere you don’t want to go in the first place.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Divorce is so weird. Why do I have an ex-aunt?

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

Finally figured out why I look so bad in pictures – it’s my face.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

Staying in bed all day is my way of saving money.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Pretty sure the inventor of noise-canceling headphones had a young kid trying to learn an instrument.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,686

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Tuesday is no better than Monday.

Making waves on TikTok:

My favorite recipe is the one where I pick up the phone and order food.

Making waves on Reddit:

“The heart wants what the heart wants,” I whisper as I slowly walk up to the dessert table.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

ADHD is: being pretty good at basically anything you want to be, and absolutely terrible at anything you need to do to live.

Making waves on Instagram:

Welcome to your 50’s; you can have a really good laugh at everyone moaning about their aches and pains in their 30’s.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Jacket I left on a chair that sometimes looks like a person at night stuns in new evening nightmare.

Live now on Twitch:

When I was a kid, I had to walk to Netflix.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Can I come over and figure you out?

Shared recently on Slack:

Me: trying to rest. Earthquake: Let’s make that a no.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Toothache and heartache comes from the same thing, which is something sweet.

Sometimes I delete a post because I remember I’m too old for it.

3 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When you realize your inner teenager needs a curfew! 🕒👴🏻✌️

age, delete, deletion, humor, i, media, old, post, remember, self-awareness, social, social media, sometimes, too

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Take a broken girl, fix her. And she will go back to the same guy again.

0

2 months ago

back, broken, broken girl, fix, girl, guy, heartbreak, humor, irony, love, relationship, same, same guy, take
Bird flu? Yeah, they’re known to do that.

0

2 months ago

bird, flu, health, humor, illness, joke, sarcasm
After you do your laundry, you should be allowed to get in the dryer and tumble for a little. No charge.

0

2 months ago

activity, after, charge, chores, domestic, domestic life, dryer, fun, fun activity, humor, laundry, life, little, relaxation, should, tumble
Asking the pharmacy if they have a secret menu.

0

2 months ago

ask, asking, conversation, humor, joke, menu, pharmacy, secret, secret menu
Five out of six people find Russian Roulette to be a safe activity.

0

2 months ago

activity, five, game, humor, irony, people, risk, roulette, Russian, Russian Roulette, safe, safety, six, statistics
Whoever came up with the spelling for “receipt” was an idiopt.

0

2 months ago

came, humor, joke, language, receipt, spelling, typo, wordplay

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

13 shares on X this month:

Forget Botox. If you really want to look younger, get braces.

68 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m going to try and be less of a people pleaser, is everyone ok with that?

52 shares on Telegram this month:

This Thanksgiving, don’t ask me questions about my life, just pass the mashed potatoes.

92 shares on Slack this month:

Someone should bite my inner thighs just to see what type of noises I make. For science.

34 shares on Instagram this month:

Keep your fries close and your onion rings closer.

98 shares on Twitch this month:

The man who invented autocorrect has died. Restaurant in peace.

74 shares on Twitch this month:

Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

98 shares on Facebook this month:

Everyone’s a gangster until they see a rainbow.

44 shares on WeChat this month:

Now I get why my grandma got up early to have a little coffee by herself.

86 shares on Instagram this month:

Grocery shopping while hungry feels like online shopping while drunk.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

You can tell a group isn’t gonna make it big just by their name.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

I may look fine on the outside, but on the inside I’m hungry again.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Thoughts more intrusive than a 90s sitcom neighbor.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

If the earth was flat, many people would have already jumped off it.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

My my husband’s favorite thing is when I blame him for losing something that’s actually in my hand.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

And to think I survived a global pandemic for this.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Twitter is the only place where well-articulated sentences still get misinterpreted. You can say “I like pancakes,” and somebody will say, “So you hate waffles?”

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

Let the kids believe in Santa. I believed the Undertaker and Kane were brothers.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

Why do boys never buy the Pro Max iPhones? I swear it’s only girls with big phones.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

Wanna perform obscene blood rituals under the full moon, or nah?

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WeChat:

And then the vodka whispered, “Say what you really think.”

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I don’t understand construction. Like, how do they know what to do next?

Shared recently on Facebook:

You’re not lazy, you’re just buffering in HD.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Welcome to your 50s, you now take supplements to help your memory, but you can’t remember if you took them today.

Just shared via Discord:

Due to inflation, you can now eat food that has been on the floor for up to 7.3 seconds.

Live now on X:

If I say “with all due respect,” nothing respectful is about to come out of my mouth.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Going to the gym to exercise my demons.

Spotted on Discord:

Nobody flirts better than a girl with zero interest.

Spotted on Telegram:

Umbrellas are great if you only want to get wet sideways.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I think more people would actually heal from their trauma if they got revenge.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Sometimes I delete a post because I remember I’m too old for it.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Take a broken girl, fix her. And she will go back to the same guy again.

Bird flu? Yeah, they’re known to do that.

After you do your laundry, you should be allowed to get in the dryer and tumble for a little. No charge.

Asking the pharmacy if they have a secret menu.

Five out of six people find Russian Roulette to be a safe activity.

Whoever came up with the spelling for “receipt” was an idiopt.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨