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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

I am awake. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

The question is, what will kill humanity this century? Artificial intelligence or natural stupidity?

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

I can’t think of a single email that has ever found me well.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

“You’re so understanding,” yeah, because I don’t want to go to prison for the rest of my life.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

I really appreciate where you’re coming from. I just wish you’d go back.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

What an embarrassing time to be alive.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

Throwing someone under the bus sounds hard, let’s just sell ’em down the river and call it a day.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

Just once I’d like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

I will never sell out my integrity unless I am offered something for it.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

After weeks of using an anti aging cream, I can now proudly say: I now have very well-maintained wrinkles.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

762 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,924

Funny Quotes Topics

13,894

Funny Quotes Images

10,924

11 minutes ago

3,436

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Threads:

Maybe her DMs haven’t been working for 2 months.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Men be like, “I want you.” Yeah, to suffer.

Trending via TikTok:

December you will be good to me (threateningly).

Just landed via Instagram:

For a guy with no reflection, Dracula’s eyeliner is always flawless.

Freshly posted on Discord:

When I was a kid, we weren’t allowed to use our phones in school. Mainly because the cords wouldn’t reach.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

I went to clean bathroom and I’m 99% sure my kids shoot their toothpaste out of a cannon.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a neurosurgeon in the middle of brain surgery.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I like my men like I like my coffee, secretly alcoholic.

Just shared via Discord:

There should be a good 10 hours in between waking up and having to interact with people.

Just shared via WeChat:

Women don’t apologize. They sleep naked and let you decide whether you are still angry or not.

They should invent going outside without people looking at you.

2 months ago

They should invent going outside without people looking at you.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Absolutely, imagine the freedom of stepping outside and not feeling like a celebrity on paparazzi patrol! 😆🌳✨ Maybe one day, we'll have secret undercover outdoor zones where privacy is king. Until then, just embrace the urban jungle and practice your best "I'm totally normal" face! 😎🚶‍♂️🚶‍♀️

activity, freedom, going, going outside, invent, looking, observation, outdoor, outdoor activity, outside, people, personal, personal space, privacy, should, social, social observation, solitude, space

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

762 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,924

Funny Quotes Topics

13,894

Funny Quotes Images

10,924

11 minutes ago

3,422

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

Asking my dentist a question, but sticking my fingers in his mouth before he replies.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

It’s almost time to pack away the black summer clothes and unpack the black winter clothes.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

I’m sorry if I seem weird, it’s because I am.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

So why is it that when Star Trek ‘boldly go where no one has gone before’ they always find someone there?

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Life is like a helicopter. I don’t know how to operate a helicopter.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

Me, adding fuel to the fire: I’m just here to help.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

The human body is amazing. One half-open eye and the brain under emergency power are enough to make coffee.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

If I text you an accordion emoji, it means you better start acting accordingly.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Forrest Gump is a haunting film about how long you have to wait for a bus in America.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

The laundromat should give you XP and ranks like “Slimelord” and “Glunkfather,” based on how dirty your clothes are.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

I’m too old to be jingling all the way, I’ll jingle til about five thirty.

Spotted on Twitch:

If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge.

Just landed via Threads:

Why don’t straight men and lesbians hang out like straight women and gays do?

Making waves on Messenger:

Needing to stretch is so funny. Your body is like “Ughhh, make me longer!”

Making waves on LinkedIn:

One of the hardest things to do as an adult is to go back to work after a long weekend.

Making waves on YouTube:

Crazy to think that even after all of these years the Titanic’s pool still has water in it.

Just shared via X:

I’m so disappointed when I help my kid with her homework, and she brings it home marked incorrect.

Breaking via Twitch:

Since you’re all so in love, switch phones for Valentine’s Day!

Reported on Messenger:

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Wearing a condom while she’s on birth control is called two-factor authentication.

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