America is like that TV show that’s been on for too long, and the writers don’t know what to do, so they just make anything happen.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

If Keith Richards survived the ’70s, the ’80s, and 1.2 million Marlboros, I can probably survive anything.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Stop letting people who are going to hell bother you.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

I mean, sex is all right, but have you ever experienced the sheer sensuality of having rock-solid proof that a problem at work was someone else’s fault, even though it really, really looked like it was yours?

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Ask a man what a good woman is, and watch him describe a slave.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

I suffer from that syndrome where your neutral expression makes it look like you’re an angry serial killer.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Kids today have it much easier. When I was growing up and something bad happened, we had to go outside and spread our misinformation in person.