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Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

I watched a woman clean her whole house on YouTube today, in case you thought I lacked ambition.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Just googled “insanity” over and over but was expecting different results.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

I’m ready for a new relationship. My past is buried in the backyard, to fertilize the tomatoes.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

I made you snort laugh, so we’re going out, right?

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Just once I’d like my dog to give me a treat.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

When I was little, I didn’t care what I wore. I just went along with what my parents chose. When I look in old photo albums, l realize that they didn’t care either.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

In contrast to the ship, the movie Titanic was quite well received in America.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

My hobbies include using the TV as background noise while I scroll on my phone.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

If you finish every sentence with “as the prophecy foretold”, your coworkers will leave you alone.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

Imagine you go bowling by yourself and you go sit down, but it’s your turn again.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

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17,766

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15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,576

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

My parents often told me I would lose my own head if it wasn’t screwed on and now that I’m an adult, I want to know what tools I need to have it screwed off.

Spotted on Discord:

Just once I’d like to buy a house plant that didn’t have the lifespan of a soap bubble.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

After 30, an all-nighter is not getting up to pee.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

My talents are so hidden that I can’t even find them.

Making waves on TikTok:

You should be able to wash your hair and it stays washed. What do you mean I have to do it again?

Going bananas on Telegram:

Do I work hard? No. But do I work smart to compensate. Absolutely not.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies. She is not “fun to be around”.

Just landed via YouTube:

I can’t be the only one who screenshots confirmations, even though you’ll get an email and text.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I’m no Hobbit, but I do often walk blindly into some rather dodgy situations.

Been telling everyone, “It’s been a good year for horses.” No idea whether that’s true or not, but they keep nodding like it makes a lot of sense.

6 days ago

Funny Quotes

Playful text about pretending it's been a great year for horses, with amused nodding.

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Commentary:
Clearly, neigh-sayers have no place in this conversation. 🐴🤔

communication, confusion, everyone, good, horse, horses, humor, idea, keep, lot, nodding, sense, telling, true, year

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13 shares on Discord this month:

Sarah Connor would be awfully disappointed in us all, letting this Grok into our lives.

13 shares on Facebook this month:

I don’t have a new year resolution, you don’t need that when you’re perfect.

41 shares on YouTube this month:

I wish I could invoice people for wasting my time.

57 shares on Messenger this month:

Being gracefully insane is the only way to survive life’s daily bullshit.

21 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m 27 and a half. I should be on my first divorce by now.

71 shares on Threads this month:

Having a toddler is wild. I’m getting breaking news about Peppa Pig.

69 shares on Instagram this month:

Nothing like a meteor shower to remind you that burning out can still be breathtaking.

44 shares on WeChat this month:

Americans saw water freeze at 0°C and said, “Let’s make that 32.”

58 shares on X this month:

I absolutely hate being woken from a nap. There were other treadmills in the gym that dude could have used.

91 shares on Instagram this month:

Dearest, I beg of you, sleep properly and go for walks.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Who knew that the hardest part of being an adult is figuring out what to cook for dinner every single night for the rest of your life.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

Elsa froze her entire kingdom instead of dealing with her feelings. I respect that level of avoidance.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Unlike smoking, vaping doesn’t reduce your sex drive. It just reduces the sex drive of the people who see you vaping.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

Watching a movie and subtitles not syncing is low-key pain.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

I don’t understand people who do things on weekends. You just did things all week. What’s next, more things? That’s how they get you.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

I like to notice patterns and do nothing about it.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

August is technically summer, but spiritually fall.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

It’s comical when I lean back in my chair only to realize it’s a stool.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

Jackie Chan used to say “I don’t want trouble“ and then break everybody’s legs.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Anyone who doesn’t like me snoring, doesn’t deserve me moaning either.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Facebook:

I lost my appetite for doing work. If you find it, you can keep it.

Making waves on Threads:

When I was a kid I thought shrimp cocktails had alcohol in them and I thought it was such a weird way to get drunk.

Trending via Pinterest:

Imagine how much better the world would be if everyone set aside their differences and came together as one to buy me a castle.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Let’s tell the truth cell phone. I don’t have six missed calls. I have six ignored calls.

Breaking via Threads:

AI could never steal company time the way I do.

Seen just now on Messenger:

When you’re young, weekends are for fun. When you’re older, they’re for recovery.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Being a dog must be wild, everyone you meet is your masseuse.

Live now on WhatsApp:

If you have any questions or concerns please don’t. Hesitate to ask.

Shared recently on WeChat:

If I could turn water into wine, I’d have lots of followers too.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I do not want to have a career. I want to sit on the porch.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Been telling everyone, “It’s been a good year for horses.” No idea whether that’s true or not, but they keep nodding like it makes a lot of sense.

They should invent a day where you aren’t tired.

There’s no filter on my pics or my thoughts. I’m just out here raw-dogging it.

Technically mixed martial arts can include tickle fighting.

Yes, I was behind the DJ booth, but only as a cultural anthropologist.

I’m not saying it’s been a while, I’m just saying I completely blanked on the name of my gym.

Striking gold in your 40s: finding a close parking spot that’s in the shade on a hot summer day.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Been telling everyone, “It’s been a good year for horses.” No idea whether that’s true or not, but they keep nodding like it makes a lot of sense.

Keep the laugh going 😂

They should invent a day where you aren’t tired.

There’s no filter on my pics or my thoughts. I’m just out here raw-dogging it.

Technically mixed martial arts can include tickle fighting.

Yes, I was behind the DJ booth, but only as a cultural anthropologist.

I’m not saying it’s been a while, I’m just saying I completely blanked on the name of my gym.

Striking gold in your 40s: finding a close parking spot that’s in the shade on a hot summer day.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨