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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

I don’t know much about women, but they love containers that hold smaller containers.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

I deliberately don’t go to bed early. I don’t want to look like I could be useful for anything the next day.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

If your kids aren’t drinking enough water, tell them it’s bedtime.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Has someone told the whales that they can’t sing?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

When it rains in New York, the train starts smelling like hamster.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

You know you got a bad haircut when she insists on giving you a $10 discount.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

That one British friend that’s too bloke.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

Telling my guitar to “stay tuned”.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Being complimented by a girl in public is like getting kissed by an angel.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

I’ve touched enough cacti to know they are sharp, but also not enough to stop touching cacti.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,694

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Slack:

This quote is invisible. Only people who masturbate a lot can read it.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Men, why do you still have the boxes your electronics came in?

Going viral on Twitch:

I never oversleep in the mornings. I set an alarm and a back-up alarm. Plus, there’s also a noisy kid once those fail.

Spotted on Reddit:

Toddlers will take your last nerve, deep fry it and eat it for breakfast.

Making waves on WeChat:

What did parents do before smart phones, hold their babies with two hands or something?

Going bananas on Threads:

Are you my pinky toe, because I will bang you on all my furniture.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Feelings are like children. You don’t want them driving the car, but you shouldn’t stuff them in the trunk either.

Just shared via Threads:

Are cassette tapes considered classical music yet?

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Career anxiety hitting at random hours of the day.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Everyone’s gangsta until grandma grabs that wooden spoon.

Funny ambitious quotes

Funny ambitious quotes bring a hilarious twist to chasing your dreams 🎯😂 Whether you’re aiming for the stars or just trying to survive Monday, these witty lines will keep you motivated and laughing along the way 🤩🚀 Ready to tackle goals with a smile and a little sass? Let’s dive into some ambition-packed humor that proves success doesn’t have to be so serious! 💪😜✨

New funny ambitious quotes 👇

All funny ambitious quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

61 shares on Threads this month:

Before we all die from nuclear war or a global climate crisis, can we get a little alien invasion as a treat.

24 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m seriously considering adoption. Who wants me?

44 shares on Pinterest this month:

Little do my friends know they’re healing me every time we hang out.

19 shares on Discord this month:

When a door closes in life, sometimes it’s better to grab a hammer and nails and make sure the damn thing stays shut.

12 shares on Pinterest this month:

I am awake and ready to be disappointed.

74 shares on Pinterest this month:

I have an emotional support chicken roasting in the oven.

34 shares on Facebook this month:

I don’t hate you, I just don’t want to see you alive.

40 shares on Facebook this month:

Show dominance by ending the year in bed.

54 shares on TikTok this month:

Having to write cover letters is so dumb. Do you really believe my dream ever since I was a little girl was to work for you? No. It was to ride a pony on a funky space rainbow. Grow up.

60 shares on Telegram this month:

Without the words ‘literally’ and ‘like,’ I am nothing.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

My issue with Jeopardy is that you never get the sense that the contestants are in any real danger.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Airbnb should have an option if you just want to use someone’s bathroom for a few minutes.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

The smarter you are, the more important it is for you to figure out how to think less.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Does anyone know if it’s possible to buy the transcripts of audiobooks? Thanks!

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Vote for me and I will halve the calories in chocolate.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m experimenting with how many apples I need to eat a day to keep everyone away, whatever their profession.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Calling ahead to the cafe to warn them to “get those beans brewing”.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Money enters like Beyoncé and exits like Britney.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Through pottery, we domesticated rocks.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes I wish I had a speed bump between my brain and my mouth.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,666

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

Men be like: I would love the opportunity to give you the bare minimum.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Nobody bools anymore. In high school, everyone was booling.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need most.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Forget hot girl summer, it’s rot girl summer (laying in bed, reading books, laying under layers of soft blankets).

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Perfume and jewelry are two things you can never go wrong with gifting me.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

Having sex with the same person gets freakier and nastier each time.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

Rent really don’t make no sense. Like, why is my apartment getting a raise every year? Who is doing the performance review?

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

Breakfast is the most important beer of the day.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

It’s so much easier to suggest solutions when you don’t know too much about the problem.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

What’s a beginner question to ask for someone just getting into being nosy?

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on X:

I’m eating sandwiches you haven’t heard of in jeans you can’t pronounce.

Breaking via Pinterest:

The ideal man is always thinking of several cool things at once (throwing a football really far, a truck with big wheels, giving a lot of high fives).

Spotted on Slack:

Phew, I thought the weather was broken because there was this weird yellow thing in the sky. But all’s well, it’s raining again.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I’m old enough to remember when FIFA was about kicking balls, not sucking them.

Going viral on TikTok:

If you’re happy and you know it, you’re clearly not paying enough attention.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Banks should have a gold bar that you can go in and touch when you feel poor.

Breaking via Instagram:

Whatever doesn’t kill you is probably still trying.

Going viral on Telegram:

First date idea: unlock and switch phones with the other person for exactly two minutes and if no one is horrified then the date continues.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Does running actually get easier if you do it a lot, or is it that you just get more masochistic?

Just shared via Telegram:

Who called it asking the waiter about the specials and not retrieving data from the server?

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