Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Me, literally climbing out of a dumpster: Can I give you some personal advice?

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I don’t hold grudges. I just remember facts very aggressively.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Sitting in a room with my husband and kids… Suddenly I realize everyone here has been in my vagina. Wow.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

It’s so hot the chipmunks are using my bird bath as a hot tub and requesting mimosas and the brunch menu.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

Daffodil totally sounds like an insult, you blooming daffodil.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

Being an adult is realizing $1000 is little money to have, but a lot to owe.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

I miss phone booths. We used to train our immune system in those things.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

Love when plans get canceled. It’s like getting a snow day as an adult.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

Seeing a beautiful woman drink her beer is like witnessing an angel take flight.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

No matter what’s going on in your life, there’s some form of potato that can make it better.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1837 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,999

Funny Quotes Topics

14,798

Funny Quotes Images

11,999

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on TikTok:

God: “You’re all really bad at this.”

Just shared via Threads:

Chuck Norris passed his driving test on foot.

Trending via YouTube:

The night terrors don’t scare me half as much as the day terrors.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I started at the bottom and worked my way down.

Seen just now on Telegram:

My rapper name would be 2 stressd.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you start eating chips.

Trending via LinkedIn:

You ever killed your own vibe by remembering?

Just shared via Telegram:

“Made with love,” means I licked the spoon and kept using it.

Trending via Twitch:

All of humanities problems could be solved with a large meteor.

Just landed via Threads:

Me going to work because I’m too honest to scam people, too shy to be an influencer, too good for a sugar daddy, and too dumb for crypto.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1837 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,999

Funny Quotes Topics

14,798

Funny Quotes Images

11,999

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,449

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

I avoid drama by being unpopular.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

If a man speaks in the forest and his wife is not there to hear him, is he still wrong?

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

You’re a ghost driving a meat-coated skeleton made from stardust, riding a rock, hurtling through space. Fear nothing.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

Americans can choose from over 1,000 breakfast cereals but only two presidential candidates?

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

Vacation is a time when every part of you can relax except your bowels.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

I’m scared to go to an art museum, because what if they decide to keep me?

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

When I worked as a restaurant critic, I wrote under a nom nom nom de plume.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

Automated phone system: To speak to a representative, please enter the last twelve digits of Pi.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Millennials are just 30-40-year-olds who look 20-30 years old and feel 80-90 years old.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

Stop avoiding your banking app. Go look at what you’ve done.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

It’s like 10,000 Tupperwares when all you need is a lid.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Clearly I’m not doing Dry January unless you mean sense of humor.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Therapy isn’t enough, she needs to know people congratulated me when we broke up.

Trending via Slack:

I try not to laugh at my own jokes, but we all know I’m hilarious.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Scams used to be like “free money!” and now they’re like “hello, we have a job for you”, which seems to be a bad sign.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Men be like “I would do anything for you,” and then do nothing.

Seen just now on TikTok:

You are the Monday of my life.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Does my special place in hell have wi-fi?

Seen just now on Reddit:

You think you’re your own worst critic? Just wait till you have kids.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I lost my appetite for doing work. If you find it, you can keep it.

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