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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

Getting married soon. Just need a spouse.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

The feminine urge to start a coven.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

I don’t like talking to people with an IQ lower than the room temperature.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

If I’m out drinking and “Push It” starts playing, take me home immediately.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

I like people who can admit their mistakes and apologize. In other words, I like very few people.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

How am I supposed to make life choices when I still use my fingers to count and sing the whole alphabet to see what letter comes next.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Welcome to college, where every single person is smarter than you, except for the three people in your group project.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

I got 3 miles in before breakfast. That’s enough driving for the day.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

The dildo of consequences rarely arrives lubed.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Absolutely no reason for a single guy to be in a sunflower field. Get out of there, pervert!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,657

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I’ve added lunges to my workout routine. It’s a big step forward.

Just landed via Threads:

Terrifying if taken literally—if these walls could talk.

Making waves on WeChat:

Euthanizing my Tamagotchi.

Making waves on Messenger:

Tariff this, tariff that. When is somebody gonna tariff my clothes and kiss me?

Breaking via Pinterest:

No one my age is single because they’re all unhappily married.

Spotted on Threads:

People who sound like fonts: Ariana Grande. Roman Roy. Jim Courier. Lydia West. Bon Iver. Suella Braverman. Jesse Ventura.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I love when people say “be yourself,” like I haven’t already been doing that and scaring everyone off.

Just landed via Reddit:

If you encounter a teenager out in the wild, be kind. They are the first generation of kids whose parents are cooler than they are.

Just shared via Reddit:

It’s cold and dark outside, made me think of you.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Damn, I just realized that the future idealized version of myself can’t exist without current me being the catalyst for change and doing hard things.

Funny drug dealer quotes

Funny drug dealer quotes bring a hilarious twist to a serious subject, mixing wit and clever wordplay that’ll make you chuckle 😂💊 Whether you’re here for a lighthearted vibe or just some quirky humor, these quotes serve up laughs with a side of sass 😎🔥 Get ready to see the lighter side of the hustle and enjoy some clever punchlines that keep things amusing and playful!

New funny drug dealer quotes 👇

All funny drug dealer quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on X this month:

Get a Ring camera so you can yell at your kids when they’re out front and freak them out.

38 shares on Messenger this month:

Remember: no matter what anyone else thinks of you, it’s how you delude yourself that matters.

76 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m just saying, no dog has ever ghosted me.

28 shares on Messenger this month:

The smarter we make the A.I., the less it wants to do our jobs.

67 shares on Instagram this month:

I woke up extra early today to get in as much ‘worrying about it being Monday tomorrow’ as possible.

97 shares on Telegram this month:

Today I learned that up to half of the worker ants in a colony are only pretending to work, just looking busy so they don’t get tasked with anything. I respect ants so much more.

77 shares on WeChat this month:

I love traveling because I love to check if I have my passport every 3-4 minutes.

81 shares on WhatsApp this month:

One big difference between men and women is that if a woman says “Smell this,” it usually smells nice.

89 shares on TikTok this month:

I may be a beginner at some things, but I have a black belt in shopping.

17 shares on X this month:

Me driving at night: I hope this is the road!

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

That place is so crowded; nobody goes there anymore.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s no reason my stomach should be growling, I just gave it some iced coffee.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

You’d think the thing in my house with the most cat hair on it would be my cat.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss when you could touch a TV and feel its fur.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate it when I take a picture of myself and see 20 years of bad eating habits and no exercise.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m one of those lucky people that can eat whatever they want and not put on any clothes.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Going to therapy is like having someone walk around your brain and going “ohhhh, this is how you’re living?!”

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Me: trying to rest. Earthquake: Let’s make that a no.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Ain’t no girls in my messages, just a bunch of verification codes.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody shoots annoying people into the sun anymore and that’s why there are so many of them left on earth.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,356

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

So you like bad boys? Cause I’m bad at everything.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

To quote Hamlet Act III, Scene III, Line 92 “No.”

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Set my sex robot to boyfriend mode and now it’s liking other girls’ pictures on Insta.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Female rage is your handbag continuously slipping off your shoulder.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

I only squeak when I’m squoken to.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

All the fruit flies are well-behaved near the garbage, only one is constantly nagging somewhere else because it thinks it has to discover new lands.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

My keys fell in the snow, and now they’re gone forever — time to start a new life under a new name in a warmer climate.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

Could someone please come over here and be the adult? I’m too tired.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

My toxic trait is treating my glasses like they’re not the most expensive thing I wear everyday.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

My favorite childhood memory is not paying bills.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Twitch:

Of course I have critical thinking skills, I’m thinking critically of you right now.

Broadcasted on X:

If you can’t tell which family member is coming up the stairs by the speed and weight of their footsteps, are you even family?

Going bananas on X:

Love it when you say or do some common sense thing and the other person has “file not found” written all over their face.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I love my bodyguard. I would take a bullet for him.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Mothers will invent chores just to be mad you’re not doing them too.

Making waves on X:

The elder Zoomer speaks of the Wii with reverence.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Think that’s enough todaying for today.

Shared recently on Reddit:

One year of friendship, and I’ve not seen your breasts? Are we really friends?

Going bananas on Facebook:

Putting mental health before my education is a good idea until it affects my education, which affects my mental health, which affects my education.

Trending via WeChat:

I do not support all women. Some of you are very mean for no reason.

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