Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

This weekend was so busy, I hardly had time to sit around in my pajamas and doom scroll.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

I love dogs with human names because you get to say things like Bob pooped on the rug again.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

My brain cells, skin cells and hair cells continue to die, but my fat cells seem to have an eternal life.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

Listen up. If he hooks his sunglasses in the front collar of his shirt, he’s got something important to say.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

What’s your favorite song about a white boy playing funky music?

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

All pants are tear away pants if you’re strong enough.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

The amount of family secrets you uncover as you get older is wild.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

You have never experienced true fear until a poster falls off the wall in the middle of the night.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

An adventure and a dragon would cure me.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

I’m just impressed by how ugly I’m willing to look in public these day.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,404

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

I’m not tispy. I’m merry.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

“I have an AI boyfriend.” No, you don’t. It’s Adam and Eve or Adam and Steve, not Adam and USB.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Mixing 1% milk and 2% milk to create the forbidden 1.72% milk.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Are you okay, babe? You’ve barely moved in mysterious ways recently.

Making waves on Snapchat:

You’re really hot. Wanna share microplastics?

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

My parents grew to like my girlfriend so much, they take her as their own daughter. Now they started looking for a proper boyfriend for her.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I can cope well with most situations. Hearing someone smack is not one of them.

Going viral on Instagram:

Grocery stores should have baskets in the middle of the store for those “I really overestimated how much I can carry” moments.

Trending via Reddit:

Thanks to social media, you can now meet weirdos from the comfort of your own home.

Just landed via TikTok:

At the age where a big break could mean either my career or a hip.

Funny garage sale quotes

Funny garage sale quotes 🚗💥 bring a burst of laughter to your bargain hunting adventures! Whether you’re decluttering or treasure hunting, these witty sayings add extra charm to every find. Get ready to smile, chuckle, and maybe even snort as you explore the quirky side of garage sales. Perfect for sharing, tagging friends, or just brightening up your day! 😂🛍️✨

New funny garage sale quotes 👇

All funny garage sale quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

67 shares on TikTok this month:

Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.

48 shares on Reddit this month:

Girl, whatever you’re going through right now, as long as you’re not pregnant, you’re gonna be fine.

23 shares on Slack this month:

Life is short, flirt with me!

40 shares on Messenger this month:

Took a break from social media because my cat was asleep on my phone.

78 shares on Facebook this month:

Being informed is the worst thing I’ve ever done for my mental health.

57 shares on X this month:

I could post “hello” and there’d be a 20 day argument in the comments.

58 shares on Twitch this month:

No, babe, your 10-minute incremental alarms starting a full hour before you actually get up only make me love you more.

90 shares on TikTok this month:

Let’s drink some whiskey and say too much.

56 shares on Telegram this month:

Terrifying if true: Her eyes lighting up a room.

78 shares on Telegram this month:

The streets are not for me. I belong in an enchanted forest, eating berries, and talking to my animal friends.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

The female brain works like the internet. You can delete something, but it’s never really gone.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

A Southerner dies every time you people type “ya’ll” instead of “y’all,” btw.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss having that butterfly feeling. People give me roach vibes at this point.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

So apparently it’s still a DUI even if you’re the birthday boy.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Saturdays are for doing absolutely everything or doing absolutely nothing, everybody knows that.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

College is not even mentioned once in the Bible. Somebody get me outta here.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Men make money to be with a woman, but women make money to not have to be with a man. Clock it!

24 folks are currently checking 👀

You don’t scare me, I was married once.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The only thing I gained this year is weight.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Aliens only abduct the people that are already nuts so no one will believe them when they try and tell everyone.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,391

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

I think we all need to go out into an empty field and just scream for about an hour.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

Ever since I was a little kid, I knew that I wanted to be late for work.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

Like a fine bourbon, we get better with age. Or, at least, … we feel better about our age after drinking lots of bourbon!

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

I usually start exploring the abyss around 7 p.m.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Always remember, if you ever need me, I’m just several phone calls and unread texts away.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

The worst person you know is studying psychology.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Them: “Ugh, could you be more annoying?” Me: “Oh God, yes!”

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

When someone giving me directions says, “You can’t miss it,” I would love to tell them just how wrong they were if I could find my way back to them.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

The Midwest urge to have a drink on a patio as soon as it’s nice out.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

I’m starting to think the voice in my head doesn’t like me very much.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Pinterest:

I don’t understand why my husband has to pay for a UFC fight when he could just throw one piece of candy on the floor in front of our kids.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

As someone with OCD, I can’t help but respect how Pringles are just like, no, this is the order you must eat them in.

Trending via Telegram:

You don’t need to be a good listener as long as you’re a good nodder.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Mrs. Doubtfire is my favorite movie about violating a custody agreement.

Breaking via TikTok:

When you report something to IT and then hear: “Oh! Interesting. We’ve never seen that before.” Is that good or bad?

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Baby, no job is ever that serious for you to be a work snitch.

Trending via Discord:

Humanity doesn’t always make a compelling case for its continued existence.

Making waves on Twitch:

My mom: sure use any towel. Also my mom: not that one.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Nothing is complicated when you’re simple-minded like me.

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