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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

I like the concept of restaurant appetizers: “Bring me something to eat. And bring me something else to eat while I’m waiting.”

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

I’m tired of commercials trying to be funny. Scare me into buying something. I want to be terrified of buying the wrong toothpaste.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

My spirit animal is that bird that knocks itself unconscious flying into windows.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Petition to change the name of rice cakes to something else as they are 100% rice and 0% cake and I’m tired of all the gaslighting.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

A big shout-out to all the beekeepers. Our unstung heroes.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

I’m not good at quickly making up derogatory names on the fly, unless I’m driving.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

I’m not like other teenagers, I’m 51.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

Quality women really do attract everyone. A bright light always attracts all types of bugs.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Breaking news: you’re way less interesting than you think you are.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

40 minutes ago

Users Online

3,427

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I like people who can admit their mistakes and apologize. In other words, I like very few people.

Just shared via Messenger:

Just imagine how great life would be if pizza made you skinny.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I wear black because it’s slimming. Exercise is also slimming, but like I said, I wear black.

Seen just now on Discord:

If I was a priest, I’d make my side of the confession booth really big so I could run around.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Some people are so fake, their lock screens don’t recognize them.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Unlike the brain, the stomach alerts you when it’s empty.

Trending via Messenger:

Egyptians did pretty well for a civilization that wrote entirely in emoji.

Going viral on Twitch:

Why can’t I cry money instead of tears?

Just landed via Messenger:

What I learned from Covid is that it’s basically possible to do all your work from home while drunk.

Just landed via Threads:

I hope Google never goes down. I know like six, maybe seven, things.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

40 minutes ago

Users Online

3,430

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

Needs to be a Google Maps setting where you can ask them not to make you take a left across four lanes of oncoming traffic.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

I just refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good to watch.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

Everything I like is either expensive, illegal, or wont text me back.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

Sometimes when I’m having a particularly stressful day, I take a pregnancy test to remind myself that at least one thing in my life is still going as planned.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

As an academic, I sometimes dream about writing fiction instead, and then I remember grant proposals.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

The concept of a courtroom sketch artist is so funny to me. Here’s our little murder doodler.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

If my wife and I got divorced and moved to separate states, I’m convinced I would still hear her chewing.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Telling my coworkers I can’t talk in meetings today because I need to save my voice for concerts this weekend.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

Now that Christmas and New Year are out of the way, we can focus on the things that really matter: My posts.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

Reverse cowgirl because first dates are awkward.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

Hardly a day goes by without me being reminded that an academic degree has nothing to do with intelligence.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I wanna meet the person whose parents are super disappointed he went to medical school instead of becoming a stand-up comedian.

Spotted on Pinterest:

We went on a family vacation and it was a terrible experience. It was all whining, complaining, and tantrums. And don’t get me started on what my kids did.

Making waves on Threads:

Went to the toilet today without my cell phone. There are 245 tiles.

Going viral on Telegram:

Have come to the devastating realization that I am an over-nodder on video calls.

Shared recently on Discord:

I think it’s time when we buy new clothes that we have the option to buy the body they’re being modelled in too.

Trending via WhatsApp:

You look like you suck at Mario Kart.

Just landed via Reddit:

When I was young I fixed my parents’ computer and now that I’m older I fix computers for my kids. Are we the only generation that knows how computers work?

Just landed via Discord:

The best essential oils are the ones that drip out of Tacos.

Trending via WeChat:

Sperm me would be swimming in the other direction.

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