Commentary:
"Who needs people when you've got a well-stocked fridge illuminating your world? 🌟🥪 #FridgeGoals #BrighterThanTheSun"
Tag Archives: 1458 Funny life quotes
All I want is to live well and to die in a manner so bizarre and gruesome it can only be described with a German word.
Commentary:
"Living life to the fullest and planning my grand finale with a touch of German flair! 💀🇩🇪 Who says death can't be dramatic and bizarre? 🎭 #LifeGoals #GermanVocab"
Tried to be a responsible adult today. Won’t be doing that again.
Commentary:
"Trying to be a responsible adult is like trying to parallel park a tank – ambitious, but ultimately just ends in chaos and a lot of frustrated honking. 🚗😅 #AdultingFail"
I had 99 problems but getting divorced solved 98 of them.
Commentary:
"Who says breaking up can't be a win-win situation? 🙌 When life hands you lemons, sometimes divorce hands you the whole fruit basket! 🍋😂#ProblemSolved"
Your life can’t fall apart if you never had it together.
My parents often told me I would lose my own head if it wasn’t screwed on and now that I’m an adult, I want to know what tools I need to have it screwed off.
Commentary:
"Looks like someone finally found the courage to ask the burning question 🔧🤪 Who needs a map when you've got a trusty screwdriver, right? 🔩 #AdultingAtItsFinest"
The trouble with living alone is that it’s always my turn to do the dishes.
Who really needs jetpacks, I want to be able to start over from my last save point.
I don’t want flying cars, I want the ability to start again from my last save point.
I’m at a place in my life when errands are starting to count as going out.
Commentary:
"Who needs a night out when you can have a thrilling adventure at the grocery store 🛒, the post office 📬, and the DMV 🚗? Life's a party, just with more paperwork and fewer cocktails! 🎉📝🥂"