12 funny goals quotes - Wordgag

All of my fitness goals are within reach, but unfortunately, so are the crisps.

May 30, 2026

Getting older is so fun. Your life goals slowly transition from things like ‘land a dream job’ to ‘successfully grow a cherry tomato.’

May 29, 2026

When you realize your punishments as a kid (stay home, take a nap, no junk food, go to bed early) are now your goals as an adult.

May 28, 2026

Girl talk is my favorite. You go from discussing goals to talking about shoes, to hating men, to planning a trip in six minutes.

May 27, 2026

All I want is to live well and to die in a manner so bizarre and gruesome it can only be described with a German word.

May 26, 2026

Your twenties are for working towards a life you later won’t want.

May 25, 2026

Me: I’ve always wanted to stare at someone from across the street then disappear when a bus passes. Interviewer: I meant more like “professional goals”.

May 24, 2026

Today, I’m going to give it my almost.

May 24, 2026

When I was a little girl, I always dreamed of growing up to satisfy user needs in a way that meets business goals for transformative outcomes.

May 23, 2026

My workout goals are simple: I’d just like to be able to get up off the floor without looking like a turtle trying to flip itself back over.

May 21, 2026

I just want what every middle-aged person wants: to remember what it was that I wanted.

May 20, 2026

I want to be so rich that when I see a spider in my house I won’t kill it, I’d buy another house.

May 20, 2026