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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

It’d be nice if my bank account filled up as quickly as my laundry basket.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

They monitor me harder than Britney Spears around here.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

I’ve got the nativity scene facing the TV, so baby Jesus can watch “Die Hard.”

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

I withdraw my argument. I didn’t realize you had a meme to back you up.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

Mad that so many renaissance artists were named after ninja turtles.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

Thank god I played a lot of Tetris as a kid or I never would have been able to get everything into the freezer.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

I wish I could invoice people for wasting my time.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

If you can’t laugh at yourself, I will.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2543 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,705

Funny Quotes Topics

15,362

Funny Quotes Images

12,705

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,468

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

“Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.” Yeah, because I won’t be leaving my bed.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I miss the way I viewed the world before I found out too much about it.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I’m eating for two; me and the person I strive to be.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Time to put the stressful screen away (phone) and switch to the comfort screen (Kindle).

Live now on Facebook:

Every girl has a dude in her inbox talking to himself.

Breaking via Reddit:

I love Fleetwood Mac, but “thunder only happens when it’s raining” is just not true.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Being an adult is when you ask the babysitter when you should be home.

Just landed via Threads:

Due to unfortunate circumstances, things are no longer fergalicious nor bootylicious.

Shared recently on Slack:

Mashed potatoes are just German guacamole.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

“The only thing standing between you and your dreams is you!” Yeah, have you met me? That’s gonna be a problem.

Home » Funny Modern Knowledge Quotes

Funny modern knowledge quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2543 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,705

Funny Quotes Topics

15,362

Funny Quotes Images

12,705

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,439

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Was that meant to be a joke or did you just accidentally spill a bunch of words you were carrying around?

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Note to self: just because it’s in the map app’s directions, doesn’t mean the road is paved.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Drilling for oil is well boring.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

I broke up with the gym. We were just not working out.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

I wonder if my bank account thinks about me and has panic attacks.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

You are never too old to achieve your dreams. Prince Charles had to wait 73 years.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

You look like you can go as yourself for Halloween.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

I hope we’re good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through walls and scare people.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 50s… A new pain will be be assigned to you shortly.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

They say an apple a day keeps a doctor away. But what do I need to eat to keep everyone away?

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

Wishing all the contacts in my phone “Merry Christmas, I hope you get what you deserve” and just letting that work itself out.

Trending via Facebook:

If you’re not easily offended, why are you even online?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I stopped understanding math when the alphabet decided to get involved.

Trending via Messenger:

You should introduce your upper lip to your bottom lip sometime and shut up.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I put the mess in domestic.

Just shared via X:

How is a plant not able to handle direct sunlight? You’re from outside.

Reported on Pinterest:

I hate it when I turn on the car in the morning and the music starts blasting… It’s like, woah, I’m not the same person I was last night.

Just shared via WeChat:

I want my boyfriend to be so hot strangers know he’s not funny.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Hey man, be careful on the trampoline, one of my buddies never came back down.

Live now on WhatsApp:

At what point in not being able to sleep do I throw the towel in and have a beer, since maybe that will help?

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