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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

I’ve been closer to death than a stable relationship.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

The longer I work in corporate, the more I realize… Micromanaging is just insecurity dressed up as leadership.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

It goes like this: You are born and then you basically do almost everything wrong. Then you die.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Can you put some pants on my voodoo doll and pop some money in the pocket, please?

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

Why would I take the high road when I could take the psychopath?

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Has anyone ever died from waiting for a group of people to decide what they want to eat.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

My age is news to me every single time I remember.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Gonna finish eating all these Christmas cookies so I’m no longer tempted to eat them.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

How are there low birth rates when everyone here is a big baby?

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

They should invent weekends that are long-lasting.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,550

Funny Quotes Topics

16,782

Funny Quotes Images

14,550

Nov 27, 2025

4,050

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on YouTube:

Therapy isn’t enough. I need a new identity and a passport.

Going viral on YouTube:

Whoever said “Out of sight, out of mind” never had a spider disappear in their bedroom.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Not being filthy rich is continuing to be a huge inconvenience for me.

Just shared via Discord:

Not being able to teleport is continuing to be a huge inconvenience for me.

Making waves on Threads:

Your future doctor is using ChatGPT to pass med school so you better start eating healthy.

Just landed via YouTube:

Whoever said having a crush is when you feel the most like Carrie Bradshaw was so real for that.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Today, I’m wearing pink to raise awareness for people like me who forget to separate their red laundry from their whites.

Spotted on Slack:

Subtitles are for when you’re eating chips.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Cats are the best authoritarians. You will do their bidding, and you will like it.

Making waves on YouTube:

Going from summer clothes to winter clothes: “Okay!” Going from winter clothes to summer clothes: “I AM NOT READY!”

Home » Funny New Things Quotes

Funny new things quotes

New funny new things quotes 👇

3 weeks ago

Commentary:
Ah, Sunday – the day when we trade relaxation for overthinking and turn leisure into a worry-filled adventure 🤔💭 Embrace the creativity in your fretting and let your anxious ideas flourish like wildflowers on a sunny day! Remember, worrying is just brainstorming potential solutions in advance 😉🌼 #SundayVibes #InnovativeAnxiety

day, favorite, favorite day, humor, invent, new, new things, procrastination, relaxation, Sunday, things, worry
2 months ago

Commentary:
"Becoming my parents, one confused button press at a time 🤔🔄📱"

anytime, frustration, gap, generational, generational gap, grasp, i, learning, new, new things, parent, parents, something, technology, things, used, why, wonder

All funny new things quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,550

Funny Quotes Topics

16,782

Funny Quotes Images

14,550

Nov 27, 2025

3,767

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

Unfair that the older I get, the clearer photo quality gets.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Once I shot a man with a paintball gun, just to watch him dye.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Can anyone recommend some good places for somebody just getting into visiting?

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

The reason my eyes are dilated is because I am so attracted to you, officer.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Does anyone know where I can get my shit together?

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

The problem with expensive things is that you tend to want them.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

Some nights I stay up hella late just farting.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Men have feelings too! Hunger, for example. Or thirst.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

Getting my next boyfriend a flip phone. He doesn’t need anything more.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

That awkward moment when someone is doing the dishes, and you slowly put your dish in the sink.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

It probably feels so good to ram your head into something as a cat.

Trending via Slack:

As you get older, it’s amazing how fast bird-watching creeps up on you…

Just landed via Reddit:

I always take two stairs at a time, that way if I fall, it’s only half the distance.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

“Unavailable” is my favorite state to be in.

Spotted on Threads:

A toddler in their “why” phase makes you realize how little you know.

Spotted on Slack:

Accidentally turned my clocks back too far and ended up at a Wham concert.

Live now on Threads:

At this point of my celibacy, I can see the same colors as mantis shrimp. What do you know about blorange and gurple?

Going viral on Twitch:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here playing with my arm fat.

Just landed via Reddit:

I’ve got the longest to-do list for today, just need to figure out who is going to do it.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremedous boredom.”

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