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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Proudly doing my part to cause the male loneliness epidemic.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

Many people love saying, “Get these away from me,” after eating a few chips.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

I need a button in Zoom meetings where it just freezes my screen and makes it look like I’m having network issues.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

I hope this 17th text in a row with no response finds you well.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

No thanks, social media influencers. I prefer making decisions the old-fashioned way: under the influence of alcohol.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

People found guilty of not using punctuation deserve the longest sentence possible.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

Hey, wanna intertwine delusions and make them a reality or nah?

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

Americans saw water freeze at 0°C and said, “Let’s make that 32.”

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

I’m slowly becoming an adult. Please make it stop.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,332

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

So apparently they don’t count as sit-ups if you’re just trying to get out of bed.

Breaking via Messenger:

They should invent a day where it all works out.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

The audacity of someone being in the store aisle I want to go down.

Spotted on Twitch:

Children really brighten up a home. They never turn the lights off, …

Live now on Threads:

That gap in my resume is from when I was lost at sea.

Just shared via Slack:

When a lady compliments your facial hair, have the goddamn decency to compliment hers.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

My mama didn’t raise a quitter, she raised a burnt out perfectionist who is sometimes bludgeoned into settling for mediocrity.

Making waves on Threads:

If you listen closely, you can hear me not caring.

Shared recently on Slack:

We need a word for a type of person who spends all their time working to live in a city so they can be near cool things, but they don’t actually like going out.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Single, not sure how to mingle.

Funny Peloton quotes

Funny Peloton quotes 🚴‍♀️ bring the perfect mix of sweat, smiles, and sass to your ride! Whether you’re pushing through a tough climb or cruising on a scenic route, these witty sayings keep the vibes light and the motivation high. Ready to laugh while you pedal? Let’s spin through some hilarious Peloton moments that’ll have you grinning from start to finish! 😄🔥 #RideAndLaugh

New funny Peloton quotes 👇

All funny Peloton quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on WeChat this month:

Life is strange. We come into the world with nothing, then we struggle for everything, and finally, we leave with nothing.

71 shares on Facebook this month:

God’s plan for me does not involve LinkedIn at all.

49 shares on Telegram this month:

I might start telling people I’m 10 years older than I actually am just so they can tell me how great I look for my age.

39 shares on WeChat this month:

If you wait until the last minute to do something, it only takes a minute to do it.

98 shares on Threads this month:

You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both.

17 shares on Instagram this month:

She left me because of my poor English. But I doesn’t care.

29 shares on Pinterest this month:

Just paid rent. Now I have a place to starve in.

52 shares on Telegram this month:

Blocking someone isn’t enough; I need their PornHub videos to always buffer, just as they’re about to climax.

36 shares on Telegram this month:

I simply accept my extreme loneliness as punishment for something I did in a past life, and don’t worry about it.

50 shares on YouTube this month:

Getting tired without doing anything is an art form.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Me at a nightclub: Where are the chairs?

7 folks are currently checking 👀

That moment when a zombie out for brains walks past you.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone wants a drunk text until I’m doing it at noon.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Roses are red, tacos are delicious. I use paper plates, ’cause I hate doing dishes.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Brave of you to assume you can resist my good looks.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

lol is punctuation and LOL is laugh out loud.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Riding a bike is an insane concept. You just sit and run at the same time.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Every time my kids start whining, I get the urge to call my mom and apologize.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

The older I get, the more I understand why Grumpy Old Men exist.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

How long past date can I eat eggs? Like are they still good or am I naming them now?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,629

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

I wait all week for the weekend just to aggressively do nothing in five different outfits.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

My therapist says he can’t take any more of my talk and that I should join a group. So, here I am.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

The easiest diet is lack of money. You don’t have to do anything.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

I’m so lazy that I’ll break my tooth trying to get this tag off before I get up and get a scissor.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

I dropped and broke my phone today. Hurt more than childbirth!

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

Twitter is diarrhea of the mouth at its finest. Everyone is just going around vomiting whatever is in their brains.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

I lied, there’s no sex. Can you tell me a bedtime story?

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

If I was a microplastic, I would simply not go in the ocean or anyone’s mouth.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

Getting a key tattoo, but getting it covered up with a doormat tattoo, so no one ever finds it.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

People pleasers aren’t kind. They’re afraid.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Slack:

I’m too lazy to be a superhero. If I had laser eyes, I’d probably just use them to heat soup or something.

Just shared via Facebook:

Headache pro-tip: Bang your toe into something.

Going bananas on Twitch:

If you make it through life without being portrayed in a murder documentary, take the win.

Trending via Pinterest:

I don’t know how to flirt, but you can watch me eat fresh fruit in my sundress.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

A murder on the dance floor would explain the panic! at the disco.

Just landed via Messenger:

Turning regret into ulcers since the day I was born.

Seen just now on WeChat:

What’s said in the blanket fort, stays in the blanket fort.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

After you do your laundry, you should be allowed to get in the dryer and tumble for a little. No charge.

Just landed via WeChat:

Why is 4-8 p.m. on a Sunday the most depressing time ever?

Broadcasted on Reddit:

I don’t know which aunty needs to hear this, but focus on your own child.

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