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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

I’m going to hell in every religion.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Better to be a wolf that everyone hates, than a donkey that everyone rides.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Whatever happened calorically this weekend can never happen again.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

You can be anything. Be the person who ends the meeting early.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

My retirement plan is recording a hit Christmas song. I just need to learn how to sing and write music.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

I didn’t mean to gain weight. It happened by snaccident.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

Wine must breathe. I always hear that wine needs to breathe. I want to drink it and not revive it.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

I had a sex dream last night that felt so real, I’m just gonna go ahead and add it to my body count.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

There should be significant punishments for people at the grocery store with no spatial awareness.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,727

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

Ain’t no way there’s billions of us and nobody got superpowers.

Making waves on Discord:

It seems a little unfair that the people who want to go to bed have to put the people to bed who don’t want to go to bed.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Nothing says “not interested” quite like a Restraining Order.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

The great thing about having a mouse in your house is that I’m sure it’s just the one mouse, probably.

Spreading quickly via X:

Just because the deodorant says 48 hours, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

Just landed via Twitch:

Less is more, unless it’s kindness, sleep, or toilet paper.

Trending via TikTok:

Bloopers in movie credits is a lost art form.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I’m either freezing, peeing, or starving.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

This meeting could have been a push down the stairs.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Without the words ‘literally’ and ‘like,’ I am nothing.

Funny runner quotes

Funny runner quotes 🏃‍♂️😂 are the perfect way to sprint through the ups and downs of training! Whether you’re chasing PRs or just trying not to trip over your own feet, these witty gems will keep you laughing mile after mile. Ready to add some humor to your running routine? Let’s lace up and dive into the funniest takes on the runner’s life! 🎽🤣 #RunHappy

New funny runner quotes 👇

All funny runner quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

59 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Plot Twist: Your taxes cheated on you.

86 shares on X this month:

Micro-dosing time travel by going to bed.

20 shares on X this month:

If you wear enough cardigans, people will assume you’re smart and you can stop reading entirely.

25 shares on WeChat this month:

The sound of a buzzing fly is enough to ruin my whole mood.

100 shares on Instagram this month:

I have friends in high places (birds).

76 shares on Facebook this month:

My youngest had a mandatory drugs and alcohol lecture today at school, and he still can’t mix a proper drink.

13 shares on Slack this month:

Me in hell: “So did it hurt when you fell from heaven.” Lucifer: “Get out!”

12 shares on Discord this month:

Your honor, I was under the impression it was hammer time.

60 shares on TikTok this month:

Nobody calls you old more than people 2 years younger than you.

31 shares on Telegram this month:

I taught my kids about democracy tonight by having them vote on which movie to watch and pizza to order. I then picked the movie and pizza because I’m the one with the money.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Commenting “This could be us” on her pics with her boyfriend.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

When they dress up really nice, but all you can think about is the thrill of taking it off.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Leaving out milk and cookies for Santa is literally making an offering to a deity.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Beginning of August is always wild because it’s peak summertime, but the veil is so thin, like it’s Halloween.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Catching me in person is rare. I move like a ghost.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing can break the bond between me and peanut butter.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

“Where did all your money go?” I’m either wearing it or eating it.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

This meeting could have been a painting in a museum of boredom.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

When a man gets married he has a moral obligation to scare his wife when he sneezes.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Great news everyone! The priest who took my confession is expected to make a full recovery.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,470

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

I figured out how they built the pyramids. No internet.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

Hold on, I just need to take off my glasses and put my face in my hands about it first.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

When they have a dream sequence in a movie, how do they film the person’s dream?

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Not trying to brag but this cop says my rear end is smoking.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Life update: it’s getting worse.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

I eat posts like yours for breakfast.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

Coffee is better when you have no work.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

Remember when we had to smack the TV because the channel wasn’t coming in clearly? I feel that way about far too many people.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

If you give a man a fish, he’ll eat for a day. But if you teach a man to fish, you’ll get the house to yourself on Saturdays.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

Freddie Mercury, Venus Williams, and Bruno Mars walk into a bar. They didn’t planet that way.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

No more relationships for me, the last one was an embarrassment to my gangsta.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I like how my fridge also hums when it’s trying to concentrate.

Breaking via Facebook:

Labubu?! Sounds like a name picked mid-sneeze!

Freshly posted on Facebook:

If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself. No one likes a braggart.

Just landed via Threads:

Men absolutely love buying the same shirt in four almost identical colors and saying, ‘Yep, that’ll do me for the next three years.’

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

My neighbors were up shouting all night. I could barely hear my bagpipes.

Trending via WeChat:

I really hope that I look like the mirror version of me, and not the camera version.

Trending via Threads:

I hate when I grab a live wire and everyone sees my damn skeleton.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I’m so loyal to my music, I’ll hunt down a song I used to love five years back.

Spreading quickly via X:

Robot bartender rips me in half after listening to my problems for over an hour.

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