Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

Wow, this is a really nice, sturdy box. I should keep it in the attic for the next 20 years.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Today sucked so bad, I had to stop by the liquor store on my way to the bar.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

It takes guts to be an organ donor.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

Taking a walk: The most effective debugging tool.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

If I was in Jaws, instead of wishing for a bigger boat, I probably would have just asked for a smaller shark.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

I wish I was a moose. No work, no school, just eating grass and wrecking cars.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

My mirror needs a screenshot button.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

Be bold, be italic, but never regular.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

When I was a kid, we still ate noodles. Then at some point we ate pasta. Today, we only eat carbs.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

The problem with dating apps is I don’t wanna date someone that would use a dating app.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,377

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Reading fanfics is so fun, I wish romantic attraction was real.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Forget being the bigger person, I’m going to just start barking at people.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

British people be like “YouChube.”

Going viral on Discord:

Holding back your sarcastic replies takes a lot of inner strength.

Live now on WhatsApp:

A true friend is someone who thinks you’re a good egg, even though they know you’re slightly cracked.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Sometimes you just need a Saturday to sleep all day and do absolutely nothing.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I’ve shouted so much sporting advice from my sofa already this summer. It’s very tiring but hopefully it’s helping.

Trending via Messenger:

Somebody somewhere today don’t know it’s their last day with all 10 fingers.

Seen just now on TikTok:

That one friend who has a dangerously loose grasp on food safety.

Spotted on Reddit:

If I eat a magnet, will I become more attractive?

Funny stop talking quotes

Funny stop talking quotes are the perfect way to tell someone to zip it without sounding rude 🤐😂 Whether you need a sassy comeback or just want to lighten the mood, these witty gems will have you laughing out loud 🤣🗣️ Ready to master the art of silence with style? Let’s dive into some hilarious and clever lines that say less but mean more! 😜🔥

New funny stop talking quotes 👇

All funny stop talking quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on Pinterest this month:

Sex in the snow is wintercourse.

15 shares on Facebook this month:

Elliott didn’t care about E.T. He just wanted a flying bike.

100 shares on WhatsApp this month:

It’s so cold that men who wear shorts outside in the winter are wearing TWO pairs of shorts.

33 shares on Discord this month:

Twitter is basically a psychiatric ward where all the patients diagnose each other.

29 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Be careful when you follow the masses sometimes the M is silent.

94 shares on Slack this month:

At the dispensary asking which strain will stop the yearning.

75 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“November Rain” is just 9 minutes of me realizing I’m too dramatic to date someone with healthy coping skills.

53 shares on Instagram this month:

Grocery stores should have baskets in the middle of the store for those “I really overestimated how much I can carry” moments.

59 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I will charge a 25% tariff on my steely gaze.

24 shares on Threads this month:

Grok, is this true? Grok, am I original? Grok, am I the only one? Grok, am I sexual?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite things about Texas are definitely toast and chainsaw massacres.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I get it, orcas. Sometimes you just need to ruin a yacht to feel something.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

You know it’s a fancy restaurant when you have to point at what you want on the menu because you can’t pronounce the name.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I love cutting off Teslas. Like you may not let me merge over but your car sure as hell will.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

They should make a drug that recreates the feeling of having your number called earlier than expected.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Mid-life crisis? No, no, mid-day crisis. Something happens every day.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The lion does not concern himself with Microsoft Teams.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Super quick question: does anyone know what the point is?

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when I have dreams about work. I’m not getting paid to interact with these people on my time off!

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Nice thing about dating a doctor is if you wanna stop seeing them, you can just eat an apple.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,620

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Why do they have to make things childproof when I’m still functioning at a kindergarten level of dexterity?

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

They should list at least one alien “as himself” in the Star Wars credits.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

Making fun of bands that only play 3 chords when I don’t even know what a chord is.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

Walking around the art museum and verbally saying, “Banger,” after inspecting a painting.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Commenting “AI slop” on a high school acquaintance’s Instagram post of their newborn baby.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

It’s a good thing when your therapist sits down with a bucket of popcorn, right?

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

Sometimes I see how many vacations people take and I wonder if I’m bad with money or if they are.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

If they don’t look at you like you’re magic, disappear like Houdini.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

All these deadlines, but it’s you I want to meet.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Telegram:

I love doing research. I will look up some stuff in a minute.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.

Shared recently on Discord:

I love saying “why would I lie” when I’m lying.

Just landed via Instagram:

My favorite thing to do is nothing.

Seen just now on YouTube:

The name Ella is short for Mozzarella.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I don’t understand how spending more money than I earn is irresponsible. I’m giving more than I take. I’m generous.

Going bananas on Threads:

You don’t get much engagement? Have you tried being retarded.

Just landed via WeChat:

Schrodinger’s Immigrant: A person who is simultaneously too lazy to work, but is also stealing your job.

Shared recently on X:

I see you liked my selfie, but what about my ideas?

Seen just now on WeChat:

“You don’t load the dishwasher right,” I said to my wife just before it permanently became my job.

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